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Forum: Mental Health Discussion and Support 28-11-2012, 09:17 PM
Replies: 41,517
Views: 1,732,844
Posted By butterflymom
Quiet Borderline?

is there anyone here that is considered 'quiet borderline'?

i have not been diagnosed, but i suspect i may be. i dunno... sometimes i wish that i could be diagnosed, but then i wonder what good...
Forum: Serious Discussion and Advice 27-11-2012, 06:52 PM
Replies: 28,885
Views: 1,506,849
Posted By butterflymom
i have no one....

i am starting to feel like crap again. and i have no one to talk to about it. i know that it is partially my fault for pushing people away, but i feel like a big piece of crap when no one pushes...
Forum: Serious Discussion and Advice 27-11-2012, 06:22 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 617
Posted By butterflymom
i don't have anyone to really talk to about this...

i don't have anyone to really talk to about this anymore. i don't have any real friends anymore. and the one person i use to talk to about this stuff was my friend/couselor/pastor at church....and...
Forum: Serious Discussion and Advice 26-11-2012, 05:16 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 617
Posted By butterflymom
am i suicidal or just...???

i don't think i really want to die. but i keep having thoughts of trying...but in my thoughts i never actually die. someone stops me or finds me and i live. but i wonder what people would do and...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 07-04-2011, 06:49 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 502
Posted By butterflymom
Icon Question a habit or...?

it use to be i would only cut if i were triggered by being angry, upset, or paniced....and it was a huge inner war of 'do i cut, or don't i' before i would actually give in.

then i got pregnant...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 31-07-2010, 05:20 PM
Replies: 27
Views: 1,320
Posted By butterflymom
how did they find out?....i told my husband...

how did they find out?....i told my husband (before he had a chance to see/feel the cuts or scars). my friends that know, know because i told them. i needed a support system, i needed someone to...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 16-07-2010, 01:58 PM
Replies: 7
Views: 624
Posted By butterflymom
i told my best friend and for a while she was...

i told my best friend and for a while she was supportive. she wanted to help me, but didn't know how. now we don't ever really talk about it, which kind of hurts because out of all the people that...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 12-07-2010, 08:04 PM
Replies: 4
Views: 1,284
Posted By butterflymom
i'm 35, and i started SI-ing a little over a year...

i'm 35, and i started SI-ing a little over a year ago (in high school for a while and then again in my 30's i dealt with an eating disorder also).
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 09-07-2010, 04:30 PM
Replies: 47
Views: 2,077
Posted By butterflymom
i cut myself twice when i was 16 (but i struggled...

i cut myself twice when i was 16 (but i struggled more with an eating disorder). but then didn't start again until about a year ago....when i was almost 34 (depression and eating disorder behaviors...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 05-05-2010, 10:03 PM
Replies: 38
Views: 1,462
Posted By butterflymom
just give them a little time hon...they probably...

just give them a little time hon...they probably just need a little time to process it all. it's a lot to take in. :) i'm proud of you!!! <3
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 03-05-2010, 02:47 PM
Replies: 3
Views: 452
Posted By butterflymom
the one person that i want to care, doesn't....

at least, that is how it feels. she was my best friend thru all kinds of crap a few years ago. her and i both went thru some stuff and we told each other everything, we leaned on each other. she...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 20-04-2010, 07:15 PM
Replies: 57
Views: 2,439
Posted By butterflymom
i'm 34...way "too old" for this kind of...

i'm 34...way "too old" for this kind of behavior
i'm happily married with three beautiful children
i'm a christian who has a wonderful church home
i was never abused
i'm quiet and friendly and funny
...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 08-04-2010, 03:34 AM
Replies: 2
Views: 712
Posted By butterflymom
it's not good to think this way....

but it's what's in my head.

just had a dr. appt. where i told her about my issues. she is putting me on meds. she told me that it takes a couple weeks for it to really start working. and of...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 08-04-2010, 03:26 AM
Replies: 9
Views: 955
Posted By butterflymom
thank you everyone who responded to my post. ...

thank you everyone who responded to my post. amplemann--thank you for asking how my appt. went. i did better than i thought that i would, BUT i didn't mention the suicidal thoughts. :( i actually...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 05-04-2010, 01:54 PM
Replies: 9
Views: 955
Posted By butterflymom
need advice--suicidal thoughts?

i hope that i am not sharing too much.....so i want it to be a TRIGGER WARNING (suicide) even though i just have a question.

i've never, ever thought of myself as suicidal. i self injury, but i...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 05-04-2010, 01:36 PM
Replies: 20
Views: 1,352
Posted By butterflymom
feeling like no one cares if i feel like my...

feeling like no one cares
if i feel like my husband is mad at me for something
when my husband is down about something and i feel like i should be able to help him, but can't
when i want to...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 03-04-2010, 04:05 PM
Replies: 34
Views: 1,906
Posted By butterflymom
saw it

i saw it, i took my 13 year old daughter and am glad that i did. it covers tons of stuff...self injury, , suicide, bullies, teen sex and pregnancy. it's really, really good. the cutting scene was...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 29-03-2010, 06:51 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 951
Posted By butterflymom
i'm always looking at mine when i'm alone and...

i'm always looking at mine when i'm alone and running my fingers over them when i'm not, esp the ones in my wrist and arm underneath my shirt sleeve. maybe it's kind of like a comfort thing??? i...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 29-03-2010, 06:35 PM
Replies: 11
Views: 1,054
Posted By butterflymom
(((hugs))) i'm so glad you talked with her!! ...

(((hugs))) i'm so glad you talked with her!! your update made me smile and cry....it must have been really hard. :)
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 29-03-2010, 01:38 PM
Replies: 2
Views: 715
Posted By butterflymom
why do i have to be this way???

why do i have to be so pathetic and needy?

when i really need to reach out, when i really need to talk about how i'm feeling and how bad i want to hurt myself i just can't do it. i call a friend...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 23-03-2010, 06:35 PM
Replies: 5
Views: 838
Posted By butterflymom
what's the big deal?

honestly, i'm in one of those frames of mind that i don't know what the big deal is about cutting. people smoke and overeat and that causes health problems, that slowly kills them. my cutting won't...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 10-03-2010, 04:45 PM
Replies: 2
Views: 679
Posted By butterflymom
30 days...will i make it 31?

i know i can.

i think i jinxed myself....i met with my councelor on monday instead of thursday this week because we didn't meet at all last week. i had had a run of good day--really good days. ...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 24-02-2010, 12:21 AM
Replies: 7
Views: 1,086
Posted By butterflymom
thanks everyone for the encouragment and for...

thanks everyone for the encouragment and for letting me know that what i'm feeling isn't crazy. i've been thinking more about it and what i've come up with is that i'm looking for something....i...
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 23-02-2010, 08:04 PM
Replies: 8
Views: 822
Posted By butterflymom
dramatic sheep---that describes me exactly! i'll...

dramatic sheep---that describes me exactly! i'll want to do something and it will sound fun, looking forward to it and the closer it gets or the day of and i panic. :(
Forum: Self-Harm Discussion and Support 23-02-2010, 07:52 PM
Replies: 7
Views: 1,086
Posted By butterflymom
Icon Question telling people...too many people know!

i had to tell my husband about my cutting...i knew he was going to see/feel the cuts so i thought it would better to tell him before that happened and explain. and i confided in a friend. for a...
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