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26-09-2013, 11:30 AM
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#1
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Join Date: Aug 2012
I am currently:  
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My best friend died...
I never knew I could hurt this badly. I feel like I am dieing. It should have been me. She was a much better person than me. She has impacted my life more than anyone.... SHe understood me. She did not judge me, she always tried to help me. I can not hope to ever be as good of a person as she was.... why do the good people have to die?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!? !!?!?!?!?!?
All I want to do right now is get high and self harm... Both are things that she worked so hard on helping me with... So the fact that I want to do them makes me feel like shit... and that makes me want to do it even more..... it really should have been me and not her.
Last edited by kajira : 26-09-2013 at 11:59 AM.
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26-09-2013, 01:23 PM
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#2
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I am a fairy.
Join Date: May 2004
I am currently: 
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I'm so so sorry for your loss. It's understandable that you're facing a lot of intense emotions right now, pleasedon't feel bad about having urges they come when things are difficult but you ccan overcome it and stay safe. Do you have anyone around you that you can lean on for support?
Sending you strength, keep talking with us xx
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26-09-2013, 01:55 PM
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#3
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Head of Chat/Forum Mod.
Join Date: Nov 2005
I am currently: 
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Im so sorry to hear that,I really hope you have people around you to help.
As Aimee said dont feel bad about the urges but try and keep yourself safe, now more than ever you deserve to feel safe.x
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There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
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26-09-2013, 03:31 PM
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#4
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He was no dragon. Fire cannot kill a dragon
Join Date: Jul 2007
I am currently: 
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it's understandable that you are feeling this way, grief is an awful emotion. Do you have anyone offline to talk to and support you?
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26-09-2013, 05:56 PM
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#5
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Join Date: Mar 2013
I am currently: 
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i am so sorry for your loss, can you tell us what happened. Sending you lots of hugs
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Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just crazy. Maybe it was the 60's. Or maybe I was just a girl... interrupted.
I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside. I tried groups, didn't work out just made my depression a lot worse.
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27-09-2013, 11:10 AM
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#6
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Join Date: Aug 2012
I am currently:
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THank you all... She has been sick for some time now. But I just knew she would get better. I knew that she would be fine......... I do not really have anyone IRL to talk to. My closest friends like about 24min aay.. But we talk on skype. And I have a teddybear I hug... he has been with me through so much, my teddy bear that is.
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27-09-2013, 11:22 AM
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#7
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I am a fairy.
Join Date: May 2004
I am currently:
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I think the teddy is a very good idea when you're going through such a difficult time, and I hope you're able to at least chat via Skype about how you're feeling. And keep talking here for course. I hope you're able to keep looking after yourself and talking with us when you need to.
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