I apologize in advance if this is in the wrong place or whatever, but i really need some advice...
As i have aspergers syndrome, i find it very hard socially. I struggle to talk to people, and i often give wrong impressions and cause people to dislike me. I really don't mean to, and i can't always seem to come across the way i want to.
I tend to struggle to make friends, It will often start out well and then people will just "go off" me. It's come to the point where i feel paranoid about it all the time and sometimes i get the wrong impression. Kinda like a self fulfilling prophecy. I often feel like i don't "fit in" like if i meet a new group of people they all gel really well and i feel like I don't belong and nobody likes me. It's because i just don't "get" how to fit in.
The other issue i have, is in recant months, i find that alcohol totally changes my ability to be social. I can "relax" more around people and i generally seem to find it alot easier then when im not drunk. It's come to the point that whenever i am meeting people i dont know well, i will drink so that i feel that i can "fit in" better.
Im not sure what im looking for in this thread, maybe people who find the same problems, or just some general advice on how to fit in better or what to do about the fixation to drink... sorry if i rambled abit.
Do not adjust your mind, there is a fault in reality
I haven't gone through that problem... Well, not exactly. I don't have Aseperger's. At least, no one has told me I do. But I do have trouble making friends sometimes. But my best friend has Aseperger's and even though sometimes I don't understand things he does or get mad at him for not listening or something, I understand he's different, so I continue to reach out and be his friend because I know he needs friends. Maybe I can help by doing that, being your friend. What do you say?
Major Depression | Asperger's Syndrome | Anxiety NOS | Hints of OCD
Close your eyes. Don't you cry. Love's around you. In time, you'll fly. Don't you worry about the dark. I will light up the night with the love in my heart. I will burn like the sun that will keep you safe and warm. Like the smell of a rose on a summer's day, I will be there to take all your fears away. With the touch of my hand, I will turn your life to GOLD!
I can relate to that, I have aspergers and I also find that alcohol makes things seem easier. Though I am fairly sure it doesn't actually make me "fit in" more, it just makes me feel less like an outcast...
I don't have a whole lot of advise though I'm afraid eventually you will find people who can deal with the social quirks that come with aspergers and who won't "go off" you or get offended by you accidently or any of the other things (it's the accidently insulting people one that I seem to have the biggest issue with, oh and boring people as I never know when they are sick of a topic and so will keep talking lol)
There are a lot of websites and books about with advise for people with aspergers on how to socialise and things, might be worth looking into ?
I can relate, I think..
I don't have 'full' aspergers, but I think I inherited a few traits of it from my dad. I seem to have this invisible 'block' with making friends. At the moment I have no friends to speak of, besides my housemate (who, though we are friends and he's really lovely, I can't seem to become any closer with, confide in etc) and my sister. I'll be friendly and approachable and people seem to like me, then it just kinda.. stops. Like my relationships with potential friends will never really go past 'friendly acquaintances'. I have no idea why. Maybe I actually act really strange and they're just nice to me when theyre around me. I don't know. It gets me really down, and I feel really lonely a lot of the time.
I also tend to drink too much. I laugh it off and joke with my housemate about how it's because I'm an Aussie and that's what we do, but I do it to feel better and more comfortable with myself. Most nights of the week, I've got a glass of scotch in my hand. Honestly, I'd probably drink during the day too if i lived by myself. I won't get drunk usually, but drink enough to forget myself a bit.
I don't know if that's what you're feeling, and if it's not, I'm sorry for saying I understand when I don't..
Also in addition - I once did manage to make friends and actually have a group of friends. This was during my second attempt at my HSC, this was at a sortof alternative highschool/college. There were a group of goth/punky kinda people that sortof adopted me. It was really strange, I've never just fit into a group like that before. Unfortunately the group split up and I don't talk to them any more.
My point is that, while it may seem hopeless and awful when you don't have many friends, there are people out there that will like you and want to befriend you, and sometimes you'll just bump into them and become friends relatively easily. It's funny how it works.
eventually you will find people who can deal with the social quirks that come with aspergers and who won't "go off" you or get offended by you accidently or any of the other things (it's the accidently insulting people one that I seem to have the biggest issue with, oh and boring people as I never know when they are sick of a topic and so will keep talking lol) 
