Trauma, memory, and nightmares?

[manic_felinemistress]

Between the ages of 12-16 I had a pretty bad psychotic break down and was pulled out of high school at 15 due to my mental instability. Shortly after I returned for my junior year of high school I began to forget everything from those years until it was like none of it ever happened. I just got used to people greeting me like we'd known each other for years, but I had no clue who they were. My brain wiped everything.

I've been going to therapy once a week for the past year now because I've been getting flash backs from that time period, and it just hasn't helped. This has been accompanied by a reoccurring nightmare that hasn't graced my mind's dendrites in years... And I'd rather it all had stayed dormant. I've been trying to lucid dream for years to get my nightmares in check, I can't seem to do it. But these incessant reoccurring dreams are driving me mad!

Any suggestions? I really don't understand why it's happening now. I'm almost 21, don't suppressed memories of trauma usually surface within a year or two?
Types of therapy? Hypnosis?

[Porcelain Child]

Anything can bring memories back, there is a time limit on when they will resurface..

I am sorry you went through that though, can you tell your therapist what is going on and that you are not recognising anyone at school.. Nightmares are horrible and i hope they reduce soon..

[shadow-light]

I can't really suggest much, I have blank sections of my life too that I only remember during flashbacks/nightmares/intrusive memories, it's very distressing at times. In my signature there are some links which contain tips that may help a little, they are mainly abuse and bullying orientated but trauma is trauma and hopefully the same sort of techniques might help you

[manic_felinemistress]

Porcelain Child -
I actually started therapy to try and find ways to cope with the flash backs, I was doing better for about a month or so until I came home from college for the summer. Anything familiar to then triggers a flash back and I'm starting to get them as often as I did year ago now. I hope they do too, thanks.
shadow-light -
I'll look through those, thank you.

[Ellyx]

I can understand where you are coming from. I have alot of blanks in my memory from psychotic episodes, and alot of it comes back to me in nightmares/flashbacks. I found that writing it down afterwards and talking about it with my therpist helped. As i read through what i had written and spoke with the therepsit alot of it came back to me and it helped me to move on. The stuff i still can't remember i don't see much point in trying becuase TBH i don't think its worth remembering.

I also know how it feels when people come upto you. I was walking down my town a while ago, and a girl came upto me and said "Hi Ella, How are you?" and i was incredibly awkward as i had no memory of who she was. I blagged it but i think she could tell. After a look through my photos and old wall posts/messages on facebook, i discovered this girl had been a good friend of mine in college during the time i was unwell, and it left me feeling more then confused.

[RemoteControl]

Unfortunately I don't think there really is a time limit on things like that, your brain just shoves it at you when it thinks your ready. Maybe try talking to your therapist about this and saying you are getting it more frequently and how to manage it. She may be able to help you with grounding techniques and stuff like that. Sorry I can't be more help, I just wanted you to know you've got support on here if/when you need it.

Meg

[manic_felinemistress]

Sweetieitsanaddiction-
I know what you mean, I really wish I could just forget everything again. My therapist wants to root through everything with me and I'm swinging with that, but I'd rather just bury it. Although that just tends to make things worse, nor am I really good at letting go or dropping things.
I actually had something like that happen recently... confused, yes.
RemoteControl -
Yeah, we've been going over grounding techniques and other things like that. Upon my last psychotherapy appointment, which was a few days ago, she diagnosed me with PTSD. Which was nice I guess, because it made me feel like it was something solid...you know? Like I wasn't delusional or something. Although my first reaction to anything is to research everything about it.... then I realized why she'd been asking multiple times every session if I was hallucinating, apparently PTSD can trigger hallucinations? I got a full on panic attack when I saw that. So I'm kinda scared now, but I'm trying to keep chill. And thank you sweetie. <3