Perhaps as a moderating team we should create a simple step by step of how to delete your own post and then when people ask us to delete their threads/posts, we can just reply and tell them how to do it themselves, then its in their hands?
I don't think they should ALWAYS have to explain their reasons either, it could be something personal that they don't want discussed on the internet.
Exactly!
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Just for the record, this thread hasn't upset me at all. And I agree with Jodie when she said it wasn't a polite thing for me to do! I did act rather rashly last week and have spent the last week and a half seriously regretting not consulting those in the thread first.
Also, I understand why it has upset people as it seemed to all be done behind the scenes. (I'm sure this is something I have now said a few times)
And I also think that maybe it wasn't wise for the conversation to happen behind the scenes so that other people who weren't on the CT to see it. As I imagine it was annoying to be left in the dark.
I also think the suggestion if the OP of a popular thread asks for it to be closed, it might be an idea to give a day's warning/give a cooling off period to ensure this is the way to deal with any issues.
But I also think that maybe it might be worth accepting that mistakes have been made by all and that we should all maybe try to move on from it because it seems to me that we are going round in circles again.
Personally, I don't think we need to find a solution per say. I think if we A) keep threads on topic/keeping them to the purpose of the thread, B) Keep the spamming to a minimum, and C) let people do what they want with their own threads. Then we won't have a problem.
These are threads on a internet forum - I don't see how someone can get so attached to them that when they can't post in there they feel upset and hurt/worked up over them. Just make a new one? Post somewhere else?
DILLIGAF
"it’s when you’re acting selflessly, that you are at your bravest"
- Four.
♥
Just because you, and others, may not be able to see how people can be upset by these threads being closed, they clearly are and I don't see why those feelings need to be questioned.
They may just be threads on an internet forum to you, but they represent things and provide support. I have literally nobody I can talk to in my life about some of these things, and threads like that can give you a place to feel safe and be heard, get advice. Most importantly I was making friends there.
I think another thread wasn't created because thatd be a pretty... rude thing to do while its obviously been closed for a reason and was being discussed.
I kind of understand now, I have made alot of friends in that thread (and others) but I just don't get attached to threads etc. I don't want to cause offence to anyone or anything. That's just my personal view on threads and such. Sorry.
DILLIGAF
"it’s when you’re acting selflessly, that you are at your bravest"
- Four.
♥
When I joined RYL-families were popular, and people complained they were too clickly. Now it feels like there is one big family (the uni student thread) and everyone else is an outsider who doesn't deserve support.
This makes me sad, everyone deserves support no matter where they post. Im curious as to why you have this impression and, importantly, what can be done about it.
Perhaps as a moderating team we should create a simple step by step of how to delete your own post and then when people ask us to delete their threads/posts, we can just reply and tell them how to do it themselves, then its in their hands?
No offense caused, Amy :) I understand your view and ideally would like to feel the same; I don't like being attached to threads and am deliberately working on it, particularly after all this. I guess its a slow process though while I work on real life supports.
Yeah - I suppose I just don't like/can get attached to such things like this (threads on the internet etc) because they can be taken away so easily (as the Uni Student thread did) or even deleted if the OP had requested it.
DILLIGAF
"it’s when you’re acting selflessly, that you are at your bravest"
- Four.
♥
i fins it easier to get attached to things on the internet personally, they just feel safer somehow... but that;s probably an issue i should work on lol
If something is so urgent it cannot simply wait for you to refresh subscribed threads or refresh the serious board then really an online forum is not the place to be, that person needs an ambulance.
this.
Quote:
Originally Posted by griddlebone
I still think above all that the thread starter has the right to have their thread locked whenever they like without a cooling off period or anything else.
The thread katy started about uni has become a massive multi-user base. The person who started it is therefore irrelevent. If she'd made it as a personal support thread - she has every right to close it if it got derailed/for any reason at all. But she made a 'uni student thread' which implies it is is for everyone associated with uni students to use and she thus gives up ownership (in the form of rights over the threads open status/direct content) by creating something for other people to use.
Like I said, creating something for others to use and then refusing to consult them about change is disrespectful and a little dictatorly (totally a word)
The thread katy started about uni has become a massive multi-user base. The person who started it is therefore irrelevent. If she'd made it as a personal support thread - she has every right to close it if it got derailed/for any reason at all. But she made a 'uni student thread' which implies it is is for everyone associated with uni students to use and she thus gives up ownership (in the form of rights over the threads open status/direct content) by creating something for other people to use.
Like I said, creating something for others to use and then refusing to consult them about change is disrespectful and a little dictatorly (totally a word)
I understand that, Im aware that the thread is multi user based, I have looked at it, but that doesnt change my opinion. If someone makes a thread and they want it closed then they have that right however many people like the thread/get support etc etc. If someone doesnt want a thread to be there anymore then it is their right to ask for it to be removed and I think it would be rude to deny that request.
She doesnt give up ownership, its still her creation.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
A creation for others. Etrgo, they should be consulted before any changes are made.
I'm not saying she can't close the thread for a while. I'm saying she should consult with the people who use it in order to come to a conclusion.
It's like a head teacher/govener changing the school uniform. Yes, they have the right to, as it's their school - but it would be rude to do so without consulting the students , parents and teachers, because they are all part of the community created.
A creation for others. Etrgo, they should be consulted before any changes are made.
I'm not saying she can't close the thread for a while. I'm saying she should consult with the people who use it in order to come to a conclusion.
It's like a head teacher/govener changing the school uniform. Yes, they have the right to, as it's their school - but it would be rude to do so without consulting the students , parents and teachers, because they are all part of the community created.
Im not saying its not rude, I haven't said that anywhere. There's a difference between what 'should' have been done and what someone has the right to do. All I am saying is that they have the right to, because its their choice and their thread.
Everyone has the right not to have to consult people before closing their own thread, its their own choice no one elses.
I dont think school analogies are helpful here, this is nothing like changing a uniform.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
All that pissed me off about the thread being closed is that it came from nowhere to a lot of us and we were just left hanging with two posts vaguely explaining why it was closed for the time being and with no real understanding of what had happened.
I can see why the mods are saying they think Katy should have the right to open and close it as she is the OP but I agree with the others that as it has become such a large community that now it has knock on effects if it is closed because one person asked it to be.
I would have been alright with the closure if I, and other memebers, had been warned before hand - even if it was just an hour before hand saying it was being closed because of x reason and if anyone had anything to contribute to the discussion them to PM y. Whether that warning was in the thread or a PM I think that would have helped people know it was not their fault and feel like they had some say in what happened to a thread which is a safe place and important part of their life.
What gives someone the right to close a creation made for others? I disagree. It should be a group decision.
.
Because its their creation, they chose to make it and they can choose to delete it too.
There are times to stay put, and what you want will come to you.
But there are times to go out into the world and find such a thing for yourself.
I aint no abacus but you can count on me.
Just because you, and others, may not be able to see how people can be upset by these threads being closed, they clearly are and I don't see why those feelings need to be questioned.
They may just be threads on an internet forum to you, but they represent things and provide support. I have literally nobody I can talk to in my life about some of these things, and threads like that can give you a place to feel safe and be heard, get advice. Most importantly I was making friends there.
I think another thread wasn't created because thatd be a pretty... rude thing to do while its obviously been closed for a reason and was being discussed.
I agree with this. It seems that some people forget that other people have feelings too and are affected differently by different things. A lot of people were upset by the sudden closure of the thread.
Quote:
Originally Posted by shadow-light
i dont think people get attached on purpose... feelings just aren't rational, logical nor controllable
^Agreed
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bellatrix
this.
The thread katy started about uni has become a massive multi-user base. The person who started it is therefore irrelevent. If she'd made it as a personal support thread - she has every right to close it if it got derailed/for any reason at all. But she made a 'uni student thread' which implies it is is for everyone associated with uni students to use and she thus gives up ownership (in the form of rights over the threads open status/direct content) by creating something for other people to use.
Like I said, creating something for others to use and then refusing to consult them about change is disrespectful and a little dictatorly (totally a word)
^Agreed. I think it would have been more sensible for a discussion to have been had about the whole thing. Its just the total lack of respect for the feelings of others regardless of the rules. I understand these were the rules at the time but perhaps these should be change to prevent the large amounts of hurt and confusion caused.
Quote:
Originally Posted by Bellatrix
A creation for others. Ergo, they should be consulted before any changes are made.
I'm not saying she can't close the thread for a while. I'm saying she should consult with the people who use it in order to come to a conclusion.
It's like a head teacher/govener changing the school uniform. Yes, they have the right to, as it's their school - but it would be rude to do so without consulting the students , parents and teachers, because they are all part of the community created.
I think that is a good analogy- just because they are the headteacher doesn't mean they can just make major decisions- they discuss it with those that it affects.
Quote:
Originally Posted by griddlebone
Because its their creation, they chose to make it and they can choose to delete it too.
I disagree with this. Why because someone made one post should they be 'in charge' of it so to speak as it also makes that person feel responsible for the thread when its having issues with being spammed and as a mult-user support thread, this should not be the case.
