Triggering (Abuse) - dissociative distress thread - Page 267

lynx · 17-01-2011, 02:37 PM

I'm sorry I don't really have any more useful stuff to say other but I'm so sorry to hear that. *Hugs you more*

Horizon · 17-01-2011, 04:37 PM

Bringing the drawing to therapy today. I hope it doesn't mean anything.

But in the journal Jade said it was there for a reason.

Kitkat :) · 17-01-2011, 05:44 PM

*offers hugs to Megan*

Hope everything goes okay for you in therapy today.

Horizon · 17-01-2011, 09:23 PM

Therapy was hard. EMDR was hard. Showed drawing to therapist, she says little girls don't make that stuff up since it was an alter who drew it and she knows i'm not after atttention or pity or anything.
The thought that i was videotaped makes me very sick. I feel like no one will believe me.

ghosts in the machine · 17-01-2011, 09:30 PM

I believe you.

And I know how sick to the soul it can make you feel when the thought that you've been videotaped when that was happening.

shadow-light · 17-01-2011, 09:34 PM

I was videoed and photographed too. On http://www.pandys.org/forums/ there is a whole thread of people, in fact there are several threads along the theme, who had it happen.

It is an awful thing to think that somewhere there is a permiment record of it, and some people do seem adiment that filing doesn't happen, but it does happen.

Horizon · 17-01-2011, 10:39 PM

Thank you guys for being so supportive. I just feel really terrible about this. For some reason, this seems worse to me than what he actually physically did to me.

hidingme · 18-01-2011, 02:08 AM

hopes some of our buddies here will play the game with her haha

Kitkat :) · 18-01-2011, 11:32 AM

I understand that feeling Megan, it's the thought that it could be still out there. It's okay to feel what you're feeling (: *offers safe hugs*

Sadie - How're you today?

Horizon · 18-01-2011, 11:36 AM

*takes hugs* thank you.
Feel very heavy and tired and sad and a whole swirl of emotions today and it's only 5:30 a.m.
Don't know how I'm supposed to go through the day.

Kitkat :) · 18-01-2011, 11:40 AM

That's okay (:

Could you try and get some sleep now or do you have to be up early?

Horizon · 18-01-2011, 11:55 AM

Well I thought I had to be up early to get to my psychiatrist appt but we had freezing rain last night and there's no way I can drive there this morning, but I'm already up. Have class after noon, now I'll just have plenty of time to prepare.

I did sleep, but I got a text message from my college at about 4am regarding the weather and when the college opens, haha.

Kitkat :) · 18-01-2011, 12:02 PM

Ah I see. Maybe you could take a power nap after you've prepared everything for your class?

Horizon · 18-01-2011, 01:00 PM

Maybe so. Though it probably won't end up happening, haha.
How are you today?

Kitkat :) · 18-01-2011, 01:04 PM

I'm good thanks, just at work experience and not doing anything so I'm a bit bored :/

Horizon · 18-01-2011, 01:11 PM

What's work experience?

Kitkat :) · 18-01-2011, 01:14 PM

It's where you go to a workplace that's to do with the course you're on so you can gain experience of what it's like to work in that kind of setting.

Horizon · 18-01-2011, 01:16 PM

Ohh, okay that makes sense. :)
What course are you on?

Kitkat :) · 18-01-2011, 01:24 PM

I'm doing a BTEC National Diploma in Health and Social Care, it's the equivalent to 3 A-Levels (:

Horizon · 18-01-2011, 01:25 PM

Ah, I wish I knew what A levels were, but I'm in the US.
Health and social care sounds very cool, do you enjoy the work experience?