hey yall we are kinda twisted feeling today.. in general it seems most on here are doing ok and better that is so cool. hope emma is doing better and obadiah hope things get better soon..it is hard when things are freaking overwhelming we hate it. hang in there ok?
Sarah woke up about umm,, 4am i think? and was scared cause she heard thunder,.. i know kids are like that but..geez..
anyhow glad its friday.. payday too but money is always gone as soon as we get it for bills .. but gonna try to get a book or 2 ordered for us from amazon if i can..idk
i've got an oppotunity to find out about my childhood... but not sure if I should take it... got a thread in A&B about it so won't bore you all here, but ye, bit all over over it.
I found my old art book in all the mess of moving, and flicked through it for the first time today. I know timewise it has projects from my art classes throughout years 7 - 9 at school, but there's at least two different handwriting styles in it and neither are anything like my handwriting. Feel a bit... crap about it really. I don't know if I should take it to my next psych session or ignore it. Any thoughts?
For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen
For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other
I had that happen once... lost about 2 hours after which I walked into the bathroom glimpsed myself in the mirror and actually screamed... luckily it was salvigable though. Do you think your's is salvigable?
hello I'm new in here well i know that some of my others have posted i've looked it up you see but i'm new to it all i've only found my name today i hope its ok for me to talk i'm called Jade my others are jo and lil jo and j and i think dian (who ive not met thats why i only think) i'm 15 and have had a lot happen i think sorry im still a bit confused ive only been around a little sorry if i shouldnt post please just say
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
= it's a call.
on the one hand, you get to have some level of closure, correct? knowing some of WHY you're this way?
on the other, it very well could easily pull memories up.
question for you; which is worse?
I don't know I've always been desperate to know, I've spent time phoneing and writting to people who used to live near where i did as a child and have peiced bits together. But reading stuff based on things I said but don't remember seems scary, I guessit feels more onnected to me or something... when I talk to people who knew me as a child in my mind I sort of distance it and almost pretend it was another child, but with this I can't do that
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
Hello again
I'm still here this morning and i'm not sure i want to be as i never normally stay this long and well i'm scared i'm remembering alot of things and i dont like it i get bullied at school well when i went to school and they talk about very grown up things that i dont like talking about that much
I'm sorry i just feel very lonely
Jade x
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
Well... it's my art book, so I'd assume that all the work in it is stuff "I" did. But I don't recognise the handwriting. Nor do I remember doing many of the projects in it.
There's other pieces of paper I've found writing on, notebooks from school year 10 with poems in them that I don't remember writing, a couple of rather... graphic descriptions written that make something inside me shiver but the handwriting isn't mine. None of it looks like my handwriting, but it matches the schoolwork that is definitely mine.
Just... yick. I fel very slimy and gross, like there's a film of dirt covering my skin thinking about the stuff I read.
For those doubts that swirl all around us
For those lives that tear at the seams
We know… we’re not what we’ve seen
For this dance we’ll move with each other
There ain’t no other step than one foot
Right in front of the other
I dont really get left out but i get called names like schizo and lesbian and freak and whore and slut
You see i dont like lying so when my friends talk about sex they asked if i was a virgin and i said no as i lost it when i was small
Also boys think i'm easy and so put their hands in places and things but yeah
I'm sorry i've probably said to much sorry
Jade x
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
I've always been desperate to know, I've spent time phoneing and writting to people who used to live near where i did as a child and have peiced bits together. But reading stuff based on things I said but don't remember seems scary, I guessit feels more onnected to me or something... when I talk to people who knew me as a child in my mind I sort of distance it and almost pretend it was another child, but with this I can't do that