Triggering (Abuse) - dissociative distress thread

[Horizon]

Tired of losing time. There is no communication anymore.
I can feel them pressing behind me, sort of, in my brain, mostly Jade and Holly but I know Stacy is there all nervous.
The police interviews have shaken all of us up, I guess.
And they know about the diagnosis of DID. I hate to think of what can be used with that knowledge.
Well. They'll get in touch with my therapist/psychiatrist and ask all the questions they want, meanwhile I need to think about proceeding with this. I will need the others' help. Even (and prferably) co-conscious.

[Kitkat :)]

*hugs*

[Horizon]

thank you.
I'm sorry I'm barely on this thread anymore. I feel like such a shitty member. So consumed with this reporting process right now and just trying to maintain.
Just know I'm thinking of you all.

[flying[star]]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Kitkat :)

You okay Flying[star]?

*offers hugs*

*takes hug*

ya i'm ok. he's paranoid tht im gonna go through with killin us
i won't
he madde me proimice him and i dnt break promices.

[[Fog]]

Kitkat - Hope you are doing ok and that Ayka didn't SH in the end.

Facet - Sorry to hear that *hugs*. Please don't feel embarrassed though - disconnecting was understandable and not your fault. Hope you're ok today. We're here to support you whenever you need it.

Shadow - I'm glad you're doing a bit better now.

Pneumonia - I'm sorry to hear how hard things are for you at the moment. Are there any other nurses on the home treatment team who have a better understanding of dissociation who you could request for visits? I had similar problems with nurses about dissociation, when I was in hospital the second time I was switching a lot but the nurses used to just tell me not to be silly when Jasper was playing with cars etc. Maybe you could just print off a brief explanation of dissociation and ask them to read it when they come round so you don't have to explain every time. I have the reverse problem with eating - I am anorexic but not all of the alters are, so sometimes I used to switch and then later I'd find someone had eaten loads and I found it really hard to cope. And yeah I was originally diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic. Good luck with the therapist, I'm thinking of you.

Olive Branch - *Big safe hugs*

Katie - That's good that you're getting so much sleep. How are you coping with all the suppressed issues?

FlyingStar - How are you doing?

PaleMoon - You're not a bother at all, I promise :-]

Black - I can really understand how scary it is for you. I have a boyfriend and he always has to be careful in case Bethany or someone is around! What is it that YOU want to do? And I agree with what's already been said - it's best to try and talk to White and Jen about it because they can't consider how you feel if they don't know. Feel free to PM me - I've got plenty of time to read lots of words and it's sounds like you need to get it all out :-]

**

I'm alone in the house all day today and I've got therapy in a few hours :-[

[l.e.g.o]

erm hi
i been kinda reading this for a while and i well you know have others to
but i kinda only started acknowledging them recently (kinda made out it was something else sorry)
anyway sorry
just we have new one and its tricky
and im sorry
to hard
sorry

[Pnuemonia[Blue]]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Newlife

erm hi
i been kinda reading this for a while and i well you know have others to
but i kinda only started acknowledging them recently (kinda made out it was something else sorry)
anyway sorry
just we have new one and its tricky
and im sorry
to hard
sorry

I'm so proud of you for posting here jo and finally coming to terms with your 'alters', don't be sorry we're all here to help xxx

[Pnuemonia[Blue]]

Quote:

Originally Posted by banana89

Pneumonia - I'm sorry to hear how hard things are for you at the moment. Are there any other nurses on the home treatment team who have a better understanding of dissociation who you could request for visits? I had similar problems with nurses about dissociation, when I was in hospital the second time I was switching a lot but the nurses used to just tell me not to be silly when Jasper was playing with cars etc. Maybe you could just print off a brief explanation of dissociation and ask them to read it when they come round so you don't have to explain every time. I have the reverse problem with eating - I am anorexic but not all of the alters are, so sometimes I used to switch and then later I'd find someone had eaten loads and I found it really hard to cope. And yeah I was originally diagnosed as paranoid schizophrenic. Good luck with the therapist, I'm thinking of you.

Thank you for the reply Hannah, btw call me Emma if you like.
I was just about to ask if anyone knows any good link for info on dissociation/DID to explain to MH professionals as my therapist thinks it's a good idea Thanks in advance (Y)

[l.e.g.o]

its just hard
and im scared
and memories they have i dont and i dont understand and i dont want to tell therapist as scared she'll tell psych and stuff
and imsorry and i feel silly
and yeah
sorry

[Kitkat :)]

Facet - You're not a shitty member, we know you're thinking of us, you just have a lot to deal with at the moment *hugs*

Emily - Hope the session goes okay for you *hugs*

Jo - Don't apologise for not acknowledging them sooner, it can be hard to come to terms with or you may not have realised what they were. It took me about a year to realise that the voice in my head was Ayka, and that there were others besides her too.
It's going to be hard initially, but we know you can do this *hugs* it is hard to understand, but it'll become easier in time. You're not silly at all.

[Olive branch]

Hi everyone. Thinking about killing the body- letting us all free.

Those bastards can't touch us then. They're not better.

They will die in hell with me

[[Fog]]

Olive - Please don't do anything like that. You need the body to all exist and to be free, if you kill it you will never be free. Has anything upset you Bridget?

Newlife - You're not silly at all, it's a huge achievement to begin to acknowledge the alters. Hope you're ok.

Emma - For a general overview there's some stuff on Mind and also on Wiki of the different dissociative states. Or maybe you could just print off the DSM definition? I usually call you Pneumonia cos I don't want to call you Emma if it's one of the alters posting! How are you doing this afternoon?

I feel like total utter ****. I just had therapy and I talked about a lot of the horrid stuff and I just feel awful. I don't know how to deal with all this. My therapist is worried about me and how bad the SH is and said to try not to take on too much at once because it's a lot to deal with but I can't really put the brakes on now. :-[ Make it all go away

[l.e.g.o]

thank you guys
erm is it ok to let the others post
cos i know they'd like to especially little jo as she is a right chatter box

[Kitkat :)]

Bridget - Please don't do anything, my alters like you all and would be sad to see you all go ):

Jo - I think it should be okay for them to do that (:

[Olive branch]

Thank you all for your support, Bridget is probably the most vunerable of all of us, though she's tough as hell on the outside. We had to ask a lot of her the other day- she retains all the memories.

x

[l.e.g.o]

thanks
is it normal for like two of us to exist kinda togethr at the same time?

[Kitkat :)]

*hugs everyone*

[shadow-light]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Newlife

is it normal for like two of us to exist kinda togethr at the same time?

do you meen having more than one "out" at the same time? Ye that can happen, it's like some sort of co-consiousness-eque thing (though in my experiance it can be confusing and headache causing)

[Kitkat :)]

I think I do sometimes. I don't know who comes out but it causes me to feel all spacey and still myself but not as much... If you know what I mean.

[l.e.g.o]

ok thanks
sorry to ask so many questions sorry