Hey Justice.
It sounds like either an alter is the one yelling and screaming, or it is a memory.
Do you have any communication inside?
Can you speak with them internally?
I would suggest by whatever means you have, to try and communicate with your parts, and find out what is wrong and what they need.
Someone inside will know what is going on.
I'd agree with the above actually. My post was more about distraction, which will help you to get through the day. But as LostBoys says, it's better to try and find out what's going on and to deal with the problem. I hope you can work out what's wrong soon dear xx
I sometimes do. I often dream as Holly, which means a lot of running and escaping and stuff. I don't remember any dreams as the littles though which is a shame as I wouldn't mind dreaming about hot chocolate and the Magic Roundabout haha!
I'm glad that Emily calmed them down. I hope that things are quieter for you now?
Today we spent talking to an old friend it was good to catch up with him
we told him about the DID just in case the littles come out when he is around
i think he understood but am not sure .so we were on a high for most of the day
now we are on a low and feeling like we need to cut and we are trying not to
AA - I hope that you managed to get through the night without cutting and that you feel better today after a good sleep. I'm so glad that you had a good time with your friend, and that's great that you could tell him about DID.
I went to the GP this morning and he's gonna contact my CPN and psych and call me today, he says he's really worried about me. Didn't realise it was that bad but also I did and I'm glad to have it recognised and have someone trying to help me, my GP is amazing.
Justice,
What's wrong? Can you talk to us? You sound pretty distressed..
Alters will never 'get out' they aren't like voices people sometimes hear, they are alters, split off parts of the psyche created to protect you from intense trauma that you were unable to handle. Alters express themselves in ways that can be destructive, hurtful and unhealthy, but they don't know how to communicate themselves in any other way.
Usually the parts that are the angriest, or the ones we are most frightened of are the ones that have been hurt the most. They need to be assured that they are safe, the danger is gone and that you are thankful they played their role to protect you.
The behaviors can make us very frustrated, angry and upset, as we have other skills to communicate ourselves, but we need to see them as what they are, parts with intense emotions/and or memories, and help them manage them.
Sorry this is so hard.
lostboys
It is your job, and that of a therapist to help them find other outlets, like talking to your therapist, art, writing, journaling, hobbies etc.
Justice - I'm so sorry you're having such a hard time at the moment with it all. I am glad that you have been able to work through some of the issues with Lucille. I agree with what LostBoys says. The alters are parts of you that have had very traumatic pasts and they need reassurance and care. It's very frustrating when you have to deal with their behaviours all the time and can be really upsetting, but hang on in there. You are doing amazingly, and we are all here to support you.
Reaper - welcome, I hope that you are doing ok today.
LostBoys - hope things are going ok for you.
**
I'm not doing very well. I just feel completely cut off from reality. I wish I could get back into the real world but I can't figure out how. It's been a bit better this morning, it always is, but the Voices started as soon as I woke up and I feel really down and flat and spacey. Luckily Mencap was cancelled anyway last night so I didn't have any repeat of the hiding-in-the-toilets of the week before. Everyone keeps telling me not to panic because this has all been brought on much worse by therapy ending and everything, and rationally I accept what happened and that it's not the end of the line and everything, but it's like when I get more psychotic and stuff it gets out of control and snowballs and I can't stop it.
Sorry to hear that Labyrinth. It sounds very distressing. But I'm glad that you have found ways of coping with it. Maybe you could write about it in your diary or draw images from the dream as a way of getting it out and moving on so the dream isn't hovering around in your mind during the day?
We are not ok David one of the teens are really angry about things
he is wanting to self injure trying to get him to do other things first
:firey::headbang:
Keep trying to distract Reaper. Try and find other outlets for the anger. Drawing painting scribbling screaming hitting a pillow running listening to loud music... Hope you get through the night ok.
I am completely out of it. The tall gnarled beings are clawing at my face. I feel like I'm suffocating.
My CPN is coming round tomorrow hope she's got something helpful to say/ offer. At the moment I need more than a listening ear for half an hour and advice to keep going and ride it out.
Olive - what's happening dear? Try and keep yourself and around people who can support you.
Labyrinth - I know it's so tempting to just let everyone take over and stop struggling all the time. But it's so important that you keep yourself safe. Have you told anyone what's going on? Would it help to talk to your mum? Please take care.
I'm seeing my CPN in an hour. I really hope she's got some productive to say instead of just hang in there blah blah. I'm feeling a bit disillusioned with mental health services to be honest. Feel quite floaty this morning but the Voices aren't too bad yet.
In which case - talk away My PM box is always open if you need to have a rant. I hope you are doing ok today.
My CPN didn't have anything constructive to say whatsoever. Just a load of crap about some theory about wanting to remain a child and advice to try to be open. And a reminder that the psychologist only works 2 days a week and I've just got to wait. F**ks sake. On the plus side I have an appointment with my psych on Monday.
Atomics - *Safe cuddles* I hope that you have a better day today.
Reaper - Glad that David has calmed down, hope things stay that way.
Labyrinth - I know, but if you ever do want to bother someone with your sh*t then I'd be happy to be bothered by it It's good to get things out sometimes.
Justice - Sorry your CPN was so useless. It's so annoying when they say stuff like that. Hope you are doing ok today.
**
I had a bad night last night, SHed the most I have in quite a while and was a bit silly with laxatives. I'm not really doing anything today so just trying to stay occupied pottering around. The Voices aren't so bad today which is a relief. I still feel so annoyed at my CPN. I know they can't really do much except give advice on distraction, listen, or tell you to go to A&E lol, but I just wish they were more helpful. She just talked total crap. I don't see how her theories about childhood and stuff is going to help me right now when I'm psychotic, and I don't see how her telling me that's it's psychological not psychiatric is going to help when they won't give me any bloody psychological help!!! Grrr.
hope everyone is ok. Due to financial rubbish we've lost internet (and phone, and electrisity..) so currently using 20 min sessions of allotted internet time at the library
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My PM box is always open if you need to have a rant. I hope you are doing ok today.
