It doesn't discourage me from posting personally. I don't have alters and I really don't lose time that often (and when I do there's nothing significant that I know that I do), but that doesn't make my experiences any less valid. Just a bit different. Personally the idea of having an alter sounds very scary and confusing to me and I'm glad my mind doesn't seem to have dissociated itself so much that various parts of me are not seen as me. Even if I had one I'd probably not want to deal with it, the idea of sharing a life with someone you had no control over really scares me. So I don't think the fact that some people dissociate for very valid reasons but don't happen to do it in the form of alters needs to put anyone off.
It doesn't really relate to severity of past trauma (how can that ever be judged anyway), etc., it just means your mind did what it could with what it had in a different way than someone else in response to bad things. And also those that do have alters that are more separate from them I think have just as much right to post too. The survival mechanism might've been slightly different, but its still all dissociation, your mind trying to get away from a bad situation and manage to survive by breaking memories/feelings into pieces and not taking everything all in at once.
A thousand mile journey starts with the first step
Join Date: Oct 2009
I am currently:
Thanks Hannah, I'm alright, just sorta getting through each day...
When I told my Mum about the SA from my cousin she said it explained why I have others in my head and that they were there to help me with it and protect me... For my Mum I was quite surprised she said that.
Hazel-
Even though I don't really know if I'm comfortable posting here yet, I just wanted to let you know that you don't make me feel uncomfortable. Here or on the A&B board.
| Sarah|
i Miss you.o7.11.o8
♥♥♥♥♥♥"It has been said that time heals all wounds. I do not agree. The wounds remain.
In time, the mind, protecting its sanity, covers them with scar tissue, and the pain lessens, but it is never gone."
Shadow (re the other thread)
we don't tend to tell people other than professionals - on a need to know basis. but the people that do know (so far) haven't disbelieved us. most of them are people I've been inpatient with, or REALLY trusted friends. we haven't really had that experience, but we can imagine how invalidating it would be.
Try not to put much merit into what they say. People are so often afraid of things they don't understand, so they say it's not true, or they attack... You know the truth,that's all that matters.
Oh and Shadow, it isn't your responsibility about whether it makes others uncomfortable, it their responsibility to read posts at their digression, and to them to keep themselves safe.
We have never felt uncomfortable reading anything you write here, but we did, it is out responsibility, not yours.
Last edited by bleeding black : 01-07-2010 at 06:34 PM.
Reason: forgot something
We're concerned, well frightened. IT feels as though the system is sort of shifting, and though that has happened before... this time it feels ominous.
And since the phone calls... Those of us who work together as trying to reinforce our defense against the ntl2 sub system Because they are the ones who are loyal..... but we... well we're pretty afraid.
Quote:
I'm scared.
People... who hurt us...the deep down system knows about them.... but i dont.
i see bits of what they did... i hear screams, the screams that escape from a child when they are being torn apart, physically and psychologically at the same time, i can hear the blood drip drip drip from the table onto the floor, and the buzzing of machines... footsteps shuffling... i can't feel my toes, feet, fingers, hands. whats inside me? a clang, loud, and a muffled voice.
Hazel-
Even though I don't really know if I'm comfortable posting here yet, I just wanted to let you know that you don't make me feel uncomfortable. Here or on the A&B board.
think just in one of those "everyone deserves help more than I do" type moods today... don't know, just for the last week or so felt very consious of what I write and where I post and the effect it could have on others
"A penny for my thoughts, oh no, I'll sell 'em for a dollar
They're worth so much more after I'm a goner
And maybe then you'll hear the words I been singin'
Funny when you're dead how people start listenin'"
we are very mixed up today because we are exhausted, drained and feeling horrible from sinus and humidity making our head and body ache .. so its been kinda hard to tell who is out and who isnt kinda like we are twisting together in a blender.. sorry only why i know to describe it. wierd. was gonna reply to something i saw..but forgoet to who and what about.. geez sorry- took my lexapr, a muscle relaxer and a 800 mg motrin soo should be sleepy time soon.. Hiding (mixed w/ Sadie and Sarah)
Hugs and support to all. Dont know if its meds or heat or my mental state but i been so out of it for the past couple weeks tonight really bad. Went to restaurant with family and grandparents unable to talk just staring feel drugged making me so angry and frustrated dont know what the hell is going on. Boyfriend upset cos im being distant from him. Its all deteriorating im deteriorating im scared and angry and sad. How do i make me better how do i get a break from me
Me ojkay Hanna, areyou oka>? Rosie *cuddles everyone* wish I had better. But you dont cos you're ****. ouch. I hate switching like that. and that ^^^ is an unknown who's been playing me up recently, infact I seem to have a couple who are coming forth. It's like they've been right out of sight until now and now there's movement in there and they are all slowly making themselves known. I just want to know when it's going to stop. Who says it is going to stop? after all as long as you keep making them up then you're going to have them for ever and ever.
You are talking to: Kat The Others are: Annabell (Belle), Rosie, Lotty, Kate, Amy, Jessica (Jess), Sarah, Ramiel(Miel), Elizabeth (Liz), Shadow
this may be an odd question but I'm confused about sonething... we've had a new alter turn up: "nameless" and they apparently used to be part of Michelle... does that mean that Michelle split? Can alters split? Could that imply that alters can have systems of their own? I have no communication with nameless, I can't even feel their pressence, but from what I can understand they are very similar to Michelle is many ways, only Michelle is more violent and angry whereas Nameless just hates people and seems to think we should go live on some desert island away from all people or something. But ye... what do they mean by they "used to be part of Michelle"?
Alters can split, but I wouldn't say that "they" ie Michelle has alters, it's just the way it happens sometimes. Perhaps there were emotions/memories etc Michelle that she couldn't handle on her own, hence the further fragmentation.
We have more than a few alters who have split from another alter. From our knowledge it generally only happens in cases when the alter in questions is very rounded (not a fragment), has their own mannerisms, memories, views and ways of being. It wouldn't be the case if the alter was less developed.
What do you think?
Last edited by bleeding black : 02-07-2010 at 12:07 AM.
Reason: adding
ah, ok. I guess that makes sense. Still trying to get my head round some of the specifics of all this so when some "new" information comes into my knowledge I tend to panic a bit and misinterperate it all lol
also it happening only when an alter is very fully formed makes sense. Michelle is pritty fully formed, her Sarah and Jess are defantly the 3 most formed in my system
Last edited by shadow-light : 02-07-2010 at 12:23 AM.
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