Triggering (Sexual Abuse) - why?

[ladybug]

why cant i just get over this???????
i mean i must just be thick.
who re-adds the guy who abused then and then convinced then to have sex with them to get back at them. who does that...... me thats who

and the worst thing is ive even justified it because he made me feel special..... special how messed up is that. i cant believe ive been so stupid.

maybe hes right maybe he has changed maybe it was my fault. i mean people can change so he might have, i mean everyone else seems to like him and who he is so its probably just me being sensitive.

i mean maybe i was clear i didnt want it to happen, becaue he says he didnt know i wanted him to stop so maybe i just wasnt that clear so then it was abuse right?

if i wasnt clear it cant be??????

i feel so stupid i mean ive been looking at his bebo page and im acturly starting to fall for him again.

ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

i wish i knew what to do.

[bleeding black]

lady bug...
have you got an account on
IGDID?
beginning with the letter 'P'?
i'm my name under my name.
I hope you are OK...
*thinking of you more than you can imagine*

[shadow-light]

none of it was your fault. abusers have a way of turning things round, to make us feel to blame... they do this as they know that they are the ones in the wrong...

please don't start blaming yourself. I would really advice that you don't keep looking at his bebo page, I know it's tempting but I don't want you getting hurt

[Popple]

*cuddles*
Rach you are not thick its not something you can just forget. Whether he has changed or not what he did was wrong and you didn't deserve it. And even if he has or does change that doesn't change the fact that what he did hurt you alot.
Try not to go on his bebo page I know its hard but you did really good cutting contact remember and you can get throiugh this, you don't need people like him in your life.
You are strong sweetie
Take care of yourself
xx

[ladybug]

bleeding black - what is IGDID? ive never heard of it but thanks for replying.

i wish i could stop going on his page its just he seems so nice to everyone else. why cant he be thta nice to me