Hey,
I'm sorry you're feeling so low to even think about commiting suicide. I promise you however that it is never the right thing to do. You can never decide that your life isn't worth living anymore - in ten years time you may look back on this as just a bad experience. Nothing stays the same; you kill yourself now, and you'll never know what you're missing out on. Killing yourself is permanent, you can't change that. However, what you're going through now can change.
You said people wouldn't worry anymore if you killed yourself. I don't think this is true. You may be gone, but it'll only be the start of their problems. They'll worry about the people they care about most doing what you did, and ending their lives. They'll worry about you; they won't be able to stop thinking about you - wondering where you are. They might even think about suicide themselves. Being dead may be peaceful - or it may not, nobody knows. But what is certain is that for the people you have left alone - your friends and your family - they won't be at peace anymore. Even though death is 'the final answer', I don't think that they would accept that. I think that they'd still wonder if you were okay, where ever you were. If you haven't already, I'd suggest
reading this thread, because it really does make you think. There's
another thread here you may want to take a look at.
Suicide may be the end, but it definately isn't easy or painless to do. You could end up in a wheelchair for the rest of your life, or with severe brain or liver damage. Why bother taking the risk? What happens if it doesn't work? Your parents, who already are worried about you and frequently ask if you're okay, will be distraught. They won't be able to leave you alone with out being scared that you'll try it again. I know you must be going through a really, really tough time at the moment, but please, try and hold on.
If you're really scared about your safety tonight, then get yourself down to the hospital and explain how you're feeling. Alternatively, you could use
Live Help. Do you have a close friend you could stay with, until you're feeling a bit better? Sometimes it's safer with someone else.
Take care of yourself. I'm here if you need to talk, you're not alone.
xo
