Triggering (Sexual Abuse) - What goes on in their heads?

[Twisted Fate]

Note this could be very triggering.

Something just happened not to long ago in my town. A little fifth grader was at a party and a guy I know who is at least 20 years old raped her. She was drunk. This really affected me. I mean I have two friends who were raped and I've known/went to school with/and use to hang around people who have committed rape. I don't get it. When I knew them they seemed like normal people. They were nice and I'm just really upset. What makes people rape? What goes on in a rapist's head? I was trying to look it up on google and most things that I read said it's not about the sex and that it's more about control. And this girl... she was so young. How would a kid perceive the situation compared to an adult?

[Popple]

Its horrible but this is something I find fascinating if anything just to try and make sense of things in my own head but when you know someone who has done those things it shows how it really can be anyone. From what I have read it usually is about control rather than sex like you have found and I don't think anyone will ever really be able to understand why these people do what they do. Why they ruin other peoples lives. This is quite a pointless reply really.
Take care of yourself sweetie and if you need anything feel free to pm me
xx

[Heidi Tiger]

mmm I don't view it as about sex at all, it's an act of violence that just happens to be perpetrated on the genitals.

As to what drives people to do it, I really don't know and to be honest I doubt I want to.

[linder surprise]

Quote:

Originally Posted by Miss Pixie

Its horrible but this is something I find fascinating if anything just to try and make sense of things in my own head but when you know someone who has done those things it shows how it really can be anyone. From what I have read it usually is about control rather than sex like you have found and I don't think anyone will ever really be able to understand why these people do what they do. Why they ruin other peoples lives.

same as this pretty much.
i would really love to understand what happened because i think it would be a great help in my "recovery" but i know i will never know & even if i did know, it is difficult to comprehend ANY reason good enough to do that to someone, or even anywhere close.
i think that is an act of violence as heidi said, but i think the sex is really important because sex is meant to be something really personal & intimate & rape pretty much shits all over that. it also is meant to be an act which may make someone (women, i guess) feel vulnerable.

[Master Of Deceit]

I don't get it either. I know people who have raped as well. They seemed normal, and then it was reported that they have commited multiple rapes. I don't get how someone can know normality and yet have this evil within them. I don't get how someone with any judgement can do that.

I do think it is solely about violence, in the majority of cases anyway.

Whatever the reason, I think they all deserve to have it hacked off with a rusty manual saw.

yeah i think people are right when saying it's a power thing. maybe they feel powerless and are too seared to care that they are destroying a girls life with their power trip.

i also think sometimes a guy for instance might have been badly hurt by a girl or his mother or something and so thinks all women are b*tches that deserve pain. obviously this is a horrible way to look at the world and no excuse whatsoever (I agree with Normalcyphobic), but sometimes when i hear the way guys talk about girls that have hurt them, it makes me wonder if that's why some guys go rape girls... they think they deserve it or are trying to take out the anger on the original female which hurt them.

Also i think sometimes people are just too selfish and have never grown up enough to take no as no... They get angry that someone might not give them exactly what they want, so they lash out if a girl won't give them sex for whatever reason, and at that point, like said, it becomes about showing the girl their power that they can make them have sex whether the girl wants to or not.

All in all it's very sad. If a person is thinking about touching a child or raping someone they should immediately get counseling. They might not be able to stop the thoughts on their own, but that's no excuse for acting on them. There are people who struggle with those thoughts but don't do them and get help instead. It all depends if the person cares enough about the people they could potentially hurt to get themselves taken care of before they actually hurt someone.

[silverfaerychild]

i think that some child Predtor's could have been Abused as a child ,while some havent and sometimes those people could have a Problem with the area in the brain that registers right from wrong or impulses and they may think different bout childern and not understand those thoughts are wrong and sometimes they act out and dont understand there action is wrong.

and sometimes it probly could be a person with Schizophrena...and they could have Command voices telling them the child needs to be punished or the person could be a alcoholic...and unaware of what they do under the influence of Alcohol....

or sometimes they could be aware of there actions and not care..

just my thoughts on it

[shadow-light]

power, control, living out a fantasy, making something that happened to them seem justified, display of ownership, display of dominance...

there is no one answer I'm afraid... some people actually don't have a reason... each case is different...