I often wonder this too... I know someone who does it alot... it's awful, sometimes I have to just leave the room or I'll end up crying...
I don't know how people find it funny either... I think it's some sort of avoidance/distancing thing, like making light of it so that they don't jhave to admit how serious it is... one of those "will never happen to me or anyone I know so why think seriosuly about it" mentalities...
I think a lot of the time people just use it as a word without thinking about its meaning. Like when you call something gay and you don't actually mean it's homosexual.
People joke about things they don't fully understand...
If someone has never had any experiances related to rape for example, they might think it's a horrible thing, yet joke about it becuase they don't know how it really feels... if im making any sense?
i think people hwo haven't experienced it may do it because they dont understand the severe implications of the word,
i think people who have experienced rape may joke about it to make it seem less scary
there have been times i've made jokes to the person who knows about my abuse and he has done the same. its wierd but it does make me forget in a way. each to their own i guess. i'm the kind of person who would die before i let myself cry in front of someone, so i smile all the time :)
some people dont fully understand it.
i know that if mate are joking about things like this i will join in so they dont know im offended
sometimes also people think if they can laugh about something it makes it less real and less scarey
I think people just don't always acknowledge the sheer impact and seriousness of it, much the same way some people will freely joke about AIDS or self-harm or eating disorders. It's stupid and a little horrifying, yes, but rape is an utterly alien concept to a lot of people, and it's easy to make light of something you don't understand.
I still don't understand why people joke about this either. But i agree, it's those who don't necessarily understand the hurt which it causes who make jokes about it.
i think sometimes people joke about it because if they cant find humour in it then they will just be scared of it. like jimmy car started one of his tours with a joke about it and i have to be honest i did chuckle
The following content has been hidden - Reason : the joke
whats worse that biting into an apple and finding a worm???
being raped
which i think people joke about it because alot of comedians use shocking to be funny.
like in the media the more shocking the story the more people listen to it or watch it therefore the more shocking the joke the more people find it funny.
we've (and i mean everyone) have been socialised into believing that shocking is interesting and we want to know more so people think if a joke is shocking then it has to be funny.
Funny, I was just thinking about this as I had a friend round last night who made a couple of 'jokes'. She's pretty much the only person I've told about my own experience but we haven't spoke about it much. The first time:
The following content has been hidden - Reason : Triggering "joke"
I was telling her my gay male flatmate is doing debt collection and she said "what?! hes not scary, whats he going to do, tell people if they dont pay up he'll come round and rape them?
I could tell she felt bad as soon as she said it, so I didn't say anything. Then last night we were watching Beauty and the Beast and she said to me and my flatmate:
The following content has been hidden - Reason : Triggering
Oh I saw the FUNNIEST version of this, like the beast rapes Belle. Honestly it's so funny.
Hilarious.
My female flatmate likes to come out with comments like:
The following content has been hidden - Reason : Major trigger
If you think about it, people that get raped must want it because you could just shut your legs and then they can't rape you.
Yeah, I don't like to make a big deal out of it, even with the girl that knows. Because I don't want people to treat me differently but it does upset me.
I was friends with the guy who, I guess, raped me. And he used to make the sickest jokes about how much he likes rape. He even made a song about rape and thought it was hilarious. Me and my dad were offended by the way he made rape seem like something he does as a passtime.
I feel physically sick now that he really meant it, and that after all that none of the other people I was friends with believed me.
Rape is seen as an "edgy" and "cool" thing to joke about, often you find comedians who "Push the boundaries" joke about it which makes it even worse because people who haven't experienced it or are just plain ignorant tend to find it really hardcore to joke about. As a victim of sexual abuse myself when people joke about it (which is often im afraid to say) it gives me flshbacks and generally sends me into a state of trauma for a long time afterward. And zowie, I know exactly how you feel, when it first came out about what happened to me all my supposed "friends" told everyone I was lying about it all and abandoned me. Some people just have really cruel hearts and no empathy.
My friend always screams "Rape" if people poke her or whatever. She thinks she's freaking hillarious. She just uses it far too freely. She herself was sexually abused on a bus, but still she can't stop. I asked her to stop once and she said she wasn't doing anyone any harm. She doesn't know about me..
Tbh, it pisses the hell out of me. I can take a joke but sometimes the joke just goes too far.
sometimes I wonder if people would continue this if they knew how common SA and rape really are... we all hide our experiences so much that people start to think it's a rare occurrence and therefore will never affect anyone they know... (i'm not trying to say it's our fault that these jokes occur btw, just something I've always wondered...)
I was having a converation about this the other day - I really don't find jokes or jokey comments about rape funny at all, but I do kind of laugh along and hide that it gets to me. I guess because I don't want people to know it upsets me because there's only really one reason people get upset at the mention of sexual assault.
What disgusts me is that these days, people use the word rape in reference to "owning" and defeating people in video games, etc. My friends sling those around a lot, and most of them know about my SA. I try to shrug it off, but it's all the time.
yeah. people use the term "rape" way too freely. it bugs me SO much sometimes. i try to ignore it if i overhear it in another conversation but if someone says something when i'm with them i say something 90% of the time. it really bothers me a lot. but like everyone else has stated, people just don't get it. i'm sure if they had experienced any sort of trauma along those lines they wouldn't be cracking jokes. it presents a good opportunity to throw some statistics about rape out there too so they know it's a lot more common than anyone would like to think.
They just don't understand that it hurts people who have been raped. I never had to deal with that, but it's the same thing with cutting. I don't say anything whenever someone makes a joke about cutting, because they don't know I live with it. Once in my math class a boy made a joke about it and my friend (who suffers from SI too) said, "Don't joke about that. That's not funny." and everyone just kinda looked at her like OOOOk, WEIRDO... So I just pretend it doesn't bother me. I think it's the same with rape jokes. I'm sorry for the off-trackness.
![[pretty on the inside]'s Avatar](image.php?s=2de9a2f56a9a7b53fe58fca62b62107c&u=3305&dateline=1244111491)
