On Wednesday it will be two years since I lost my mum. I feel so lost and full of so many emotions I can't quite process. I'll be spending the day with my sister and we'll be doing the things that mum liked doing, like going to one of her favourite places, the kelvingrove museum.
I miss her so much. It hurts and time doesn't make it any less painful. I guess I'm posting this for any words or advice on how to cope with the sadness and grief and any kind words.
This is such a difficult time, being the aniversary. I'd do anything to bring her back. She was the best.
I don't know what to say but I have read your post and that I will be thinking of you on your difficult day. I just didn't want to see this post without a reply.
Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson "I hear those voices that will not be drowned" Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
No worries Lorraine. I am glad that you are going to be with your sister it's important that you are not alone.
Wannabe CPN : -)
"He who is tired of Weird Al is tired of life." - Homer Simpson "I hear those voices that will not be drowned" Sanity is a nasty disease. The world would be a happier place without it. - Rilic
RIP Kat 4th July 1987- 11th June 2013
Im thinking of you. Im sorry you have to go through this.
I cant imagine how hard it is and how much it hurts, but maybe it would help to think of all the good times that she had in her life, to know that you made her life better and she was loved and she knew she was loved.
*hugs*
I'm glad you've got plans to spend the day with your sister, it sounds like a lovely idea to do some of the things that your mum liked doing.
If it helps at all to know, two years is still such a short time, it really is. You aren't expected to be ok, and it will always be painful at times like this. I remember on the second anniversary feeling worried that people would think I should be 'over it' or that I wasn't coping properly if I got upset etc. So just in case you ever feel those thoughts: it is absolutely ok, normal and completely acceptable to allow yourself time to feel sad.
And in some ways the second year can feel harder than the first. I don't know if that makes sense, but with the first anniversary and all the other 'firsts' there's a sense of numbness and shock and just going through the motions still. The second year can be very very tough, once things have really hit home.
All I can say is that you will get through this. And although there will always be that pain and sadness, the good times alongside that will also get more and more prominent again. It's been 5 1/2 years since my mum died and I still curled up in a ball on Saturday night listening to Ed Sheeran and just sobbed my heart out because I wanted my mum and I just missed her so badly. But it doesn't happen often now, and there are many many months where I can think of my mum just with happiness and love as always.
I hope this does help a little bit, but if not, just know that you are not alone. You will get through the anniversary, and it will feel less painful again. xx
I am sorry to hear you are struggling with the loss of your mum. Can you do something nice for her to remember her by? How about creating a memory box of lots of special pictures, mementos, concert tickets and places you've been together or a collage. If she passed away due to a particular illness or disability, how about organising a fun run, tea and cake sale? Have a brainstorm with your family about it.
Have you ever confused a dream with life? Or stolen something when you have the cash? Have you ever been blue? Or thought your train moving while sitting still? Maybe I was just crazy. Maybe it was the 60's. Or maybe I was just a girl... interrupted.
I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside to try to kill the thing on the inside. I tried groups, didn't work out just made my depression a lot worse.
Thank you Liv. That's really kind of you. I'll take what you say on board. I'm so sorry you have been through this too.
Thank you yoyogirl. Those are great ideas thank you. My mum died from pancreatic cancer. It would be nice to do something to raise money to help those suffering from it and to find a cure.
