But it's really causing me a problem. Basically having a bath or shower terrifies me because of not having clothes on and it makes me feel really vulnerable and I'm really flashbacky at the moment. Anyone got any advice/can identify?
'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'
['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']
'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell. Oscar Wilde
Its hard to dance with the devil on your back. Sydney Carter
My best advice is to have really strong smelling shower gel/bubble bath to keep yourself grounded, and try to add fun things to your shower bath (we currently have a million rubber ducks and a duck sponge mitten and shower cap).
If you are particularly careful and fearless of the electricity plus water issue, bringing music/internet into the bathroom could help as distraction. You can get little bath speakers for mp3 players/ipods that are all very safe!
Like Jenna said, music or a tv show on iplayer is really helpful (just keep the laptop someplace dry!!
Some times I turn the lights off. Sometimes I light a candle and turn the lights off.
When I've been worse and scrubbing at my skin for ages, Jenna comes and sits with me and makes funny duck noises... so maybe you could get a pack of bath toys to distract you with - like bath crayons, which I really want!!
Also, I agree with the strong smelly stuff. Really grounding.
At my worst I bathed with shorts and a tshirt - so maybe try that? or a swinsuit?
Thanks to you both for your excellent advice, think I will try the laptop just outside the room and when I can get some smelly bath stuff will try that (that sounds bad ;-p).
And Jodie I will keep that in mind, if I ever see bath crayons I will send them to you (if you tell me your address).
'Never forget what you are. The rest of the world will not. Wear it like armor, and it can never be used to hurt you.'
['There is only one thing we say to death. Not today'.']
'We are each our own devil, and we make this world our hell. Oscar Wilde
Its hard to dance with the devil on your back. Sydney Carter
Ooh, and we have a really strong-smelling bubble bath that claims to be vanilla biscuit flavour and makes you smell like a custard cream. I don't like it because I don't want to smell like a custard cream, but the novelty of doing so certainly distracts from any woe! I shall take a peek and see what brand it is!
I have the same issue, I hate being unclothed at any time, for any reason - what I've found the most helpful is having music or the tv on (I bring my laptop with me into the bathroom, my flatmate thinks I'm nuts). I also agree with the strong-smelling products, it's good for grounding. This may sound really weird, but hey, it's RYL, sometimes if I'm really struggling I also conjure the image of someone I really trust in my mind and have a conversation with them while I'm bathing. Usually it's a close friend who is good at keeping me calm - I imagine what she'd say in response to my freaking out. Kinda helps me talk myself down.
Don't know if this is helpful, but you're not alone, and anytime you want to PM me please do. Take care honey *offers safe hugs*
Katie xxx
Ask me mistakes I have made
Ask me whether what I have done is my life
Others have come, in their slow way -
And some have come to help, or to hurt -
Ask me what difference
Their strongest love or hate has made.
I hate being unclothed at any times and while I'm showering I always have terrible flashbacks. I find it helpful to bring in my iPod and place it on the dock in the bathroom. There's a remote in a ziplock bag which stays in the shower so that you can turn up/down the volume or change your song. I also make sure that all the doors are locked, and the window blinds are down. Oooooh. Bath crayons. I had drawn on the wall of the shower like flowers, quotes and such which help in grounding me. It also helps for me to turn out the lights because seeing myself naked usually sets off the flashbacks as well or I use a big sheet to cover the mirrors until I'm clothed. Also my bird like to come with me to the shower (he likes to sit on the top of it and catch the mist of the water) he talks really loud and when the flashbacks come I can whistle and he will start saying pretty pretty bird or making sounds. That helps in grounding me as well.
Don't know if that's much help, but best wishes -Alexis. 💞
It's so easy to get lost inside, a problem that seems so big at the time, it's like a river thats so wide, it swallows you whole, While you sit around thinking, about what you can't change, and worrying about all the wrong things, time's flying by, moving so fast
you better make it count 'cause you can't get it back- So small
I have exactly the same issues, it can be terrifying! I agree with Jodie, wearing some form of clothes helps. Lots and lots of bubbles also helps so i don't have to face anything i don't feel i can, and just to be awkward and the complete opposite, I have to have silence so I feel in control and safe so maybe trying both could be worth it? Being as prepared as possible can help as well I think... Like ensuring you know that you're safe, and in control? Have quite a set routine in which you do things! Hope you manage to overcome this, you are by no means alone!
And there will come a time, you'll see, with no more tears. And love will not break your heart, but dismiss your fears...
Ooh, and we have a really strong-smelling bubble bath that claims to be vanilla biscuit flavour and makes you smell like a custard cream. I don't like it because I don't want to smell like a custard cream, but the novelty of doing so certainly distracts from any woe! I shall take a peek and see what brand it is!
It comes from Boots. :)
I also recommend from Lush the glittery bath bomb!
I am like that too. I find the imperial leather stuff is really good and it is one of the few things that seems to agree with me plus the green one especially smells nice.
You're entirely bonkers. But I'll tell you a secret. All the best people are.
I have problems showering too because I have issues with being naked. I don't have much advice to give but actually found this thread helpful in terms of the advice others have been giving so thank you for making it.
Thinking of you love
xx
Let us go then you and I, when the evening is spread out against the sky, like a patient etherized upon a table
- T.S. Elliot
As an update: Now have bath crayons, and it was oh so much fun. Also have bright green Horrid Henry bubble bath. I drew pictures and played with bubbles and watched The Simpsons and actually didn't have any bad thoughts for once!
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