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Old 08-04-2011, 09:18 PM   #1
frenchhorn
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Bodyshock Dad's having a baby

There was a documentary on channel 4 last night about Tom and Scott Moore. Two female to male transsexuals who are a married gay male couple. Tom had two sons from a previous relationship, but they wanted their own child and as Scott had not yet had full gender reasignment he could carry the child.
Is it ok for a man to have a child and is it ok to bring up children ith same sex parents.

me I'm all for it, as an FtM transsexual myself,I would never want to carry my own child, but I have no objection if a man does want to and same sex parents can be amazing parents, it shouldn't matter what the gender of the parents is, if they are good parents, what does it matter.

so what does everyone else think?



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Old 08-04-2011, 09:37 PM   #2
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I have no problem with it really I Believe it's good for a child to have same sex parents who love eachother and in-depth love for the child than two people of the opposite sex who hate eachother and thus causes a conflicted parenthood and a child in the middle of it all. No problem what so ever with it




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Old 08-04-2011, 11:45 PM   #3
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Go for it. But why all the media attention for a 'pregnant man' when they're still..not..men.





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Old 08-04-2011, 11:52 PM   #4
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Originally Posted by -Choley View Post
Go for it. But why all the media attention for a 'pregnant man' when they're still..not..men.
yes they are men, just because they have female reproductive organs doesn't make them any less male



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Old 09-04-2011, 12:04 AM   #5
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Couldnt care less,doesnt make any difference....as long as the child is brought up well I have no qualms.x




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Old 09-04-2011, 12:05 AM   #6
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yes they are men, just because they have female reproductive organs doesn't make them any less male
I couldn't have said this any better myself. One of my ex-boyfriends was a FTM transsexual and he was my boyfriend, even if he didn't have a penis. It's such a stupid thing to say. A person isn't defined by who they are physically, but who they are mentally.

I have to bite my tongue so much when people talk about transsexuals. I guess there a just a lot of ignorant, close minded people out there.

Ha. Sorry, I don't want this to turn into a rant. And it's most definitely not aimed at anyone in particular. It's just something I feel passionately about.



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Old 09-04-2011, 12:08 AM   #7
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I'm sure this has been done before. I remember watching a documentary about a FtM transsexual who gave birth about a year ago, but he had a female partner.

Meh, I don't know but I have no problem with it.



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Old 09-04-2011, 02:56 AM   #8
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This sounds like exactly the kind of thing that happens after 50 years of family breakdown. I mean this is a mess and feel sorry for kids in a situation like this because its confusing and a real mind bender. Gender dysphoria is still classified as Gender Identity Disorder and the only reason to pretend its not would be for PC reasons. I have sympathy for the people who are caught in the situation but introducing children to such a situation is selfish imo.

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Old 09-04-2011, 07:15 AM   #9
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I have never had an issue with this kind of situation. It doesn't matter what sex the parents are, how the child was conceived, or how it is going to be brought up. The fact that these two people already have 2 children (even though they are from a different relationship) I think is amazing that they still want more. The hoops that people usually have to jump through to have children like this, or for a couple of female to have children is a huge hassle and the fact that they stuck with it proves to me that they really want this child and that they will love it and cherish it like any other couple, if not more.

And I doubt that they will keep the child in the dark about its conception as it gets older. I think the only way it would get confused is if they said that 'Dad and Dad made you' with no explanation, and obviously telling the child at the right time when it can understand.

But again, people are entitled to their own opinion on this, cause as I have found it seems to be either an agree or disagree topic.



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Old 09-04-2011, 08:23 AM   #10
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Originally Posted by Isoverity View Post
I mean this is a mess and feel sorry for kids in a situation like this because its confusing and a real mind bender....I have sympathy for the people who are caught in the situation but introducing children to such a situation is selfish imo.

I disagree that it is a mess or selfish - if they are a loving couple then I see nothing wrong with it. Heaps of things in life are confusing Jack it doesn't mean we have to avoid them. Some people will grow up with a parent in a wheelchair, different to other people's mummys or daddys. That could confuse a child just as easily, and yet doesn't face the same prejudice.

Many heterosexual relationships are a mess, but children are bought into those all the time and nobody thinks to question it.

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Old 09-04-2011, 10:23 AM   #11
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Slight side point, but -

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It's such a stupid thing to say. A person isn't defined by who they are physically, but who they are mentally.
Ah, not quite. You've still got physiological gender and psychological gender. You can't ignore one and accept the other; both are a part of you. You can state a preference - for example, by accepting yourself and having others accept you as male, but you have to accept that you have a female body. For example, you can't ignore the fact that you stand the risk of getting testicular cancer just because you identify as a female - or, your ex-boyfriend, ovarian cancer, just because he identified himself as male.

Whilst what you feel clearly and obviously takes precedence (and please don't get me wrong, I certainly don't mean to undermine that), to completely disregard physiology in any capacity seems a little short-sighted.

On topic, I'm wondering about the psychological impact of carrying a child when you're going through FtM reassignment. It's a terrifying prospect when you're female, I can't imagine what it would be like if you identify as male.

As long as that kid is loved, and as long as that kid gets everything explained, that's groovy. It will be confusing for the child, but to be honest, when you're five everything is confusing :P As long as everybody gets the right support, it could be fine.


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Old 09-04-2011, 08:45 PM   #12
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Quote:
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A person isn't defined by who they are physically, but who they are mentally.
In your opinion. And for why, basically what Jo said.

I think raising a child in a happy home, preferably away from the media and with a family that will explain things to the child at a young age is fine. However, things do need to be explained, because otherwise it will be very confusing for a child.

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Old 09-04-2011, 09:00 PM   #13
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she is not a man if she can have a baby. also i question the use of nhs resources to pay for this kind of operation. life threatening illness should come before someone having psychological issues that can only be cured by drastic body mutilation.
i dont havea problem with transgenders in general, just the ones that want to be called Men and still retain the ability to have kids.

as for the kid, so long as its loved by the parents i dont give a **** who its raised by.



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Old 09-04-2011, 09:16 PM   #14
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A persons gender is decided by their sexual organs. A personal gender identity is decided by their personal identification. So, no, the woman carrying the child is not a 'pregnant man'.

But yeah, I'm all for it :) A loving home for a kid is never a bad thing.




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Old 09-04-2011, 09:41 PM   #15
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He is a man, its how someone identifies which is important, yes off course looking after your body physically and whether biologically you are male, female or intersex you need to be aware of your bodies needs, but if someone identifies as male then they are male.

I don't think anyone can understand the pain and agony of being in the wrong body unless they are, yes life saving operations are important, but so are gender reassignment surgery, the pain of living as trans has driven many to suicide.

it is not selfish to raise a child in a loving family, there are many heterosexual, cis gendered parents out there who are not loving parents, or who have a physical/mental condition that could course confusion to the child, but raising a child in a loving family, with two loving parents is a wonderful thing and not in anyway a mess or selfish.



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Old 09-04-2011, 09:45 PM   #16
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I dont think it matters the gender of the parents, as long as the child is loved and cared for.
And I tend to refer to transexuals/transgender people by the gender they prefer to be refered by. I dont personally understand it since it's not something I have experienced. But I accept them for who they are.



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Old 09-04-2011, 09:48 PM   #17
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I have no problem with them being parents, the only thing i found hard to understand was why he wanted to carry a child, seeing as its about as far from being male as you can get? I have a FTM friend and he says he'd never want to go though pregnancy as it wouldn't feel "right" with being male.I thought being transgender and indentifying as male that carrying a child would feel alien to him if that makes sense?

They seem a happy family though :)






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Old 09-04-2011, 10:43 PM   #18
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watched half of it then turned it off. Brother told me too due to wanting to shove something else on I dunno what i felt to it tbh.

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Old 10-04-2011, 02:12 AM   #19
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I just wanted to say a few things =]
Quote:
Originally Posted by -Choley View Post
Go for it. But why all the media attention for a 'pregnant man' when they're still..not..men.
To all those who took offense, I don't think Nic is in any way suggesting that they're not mentally male. I just think the media attention they get is misleading. The media make it into a massive 'woah crazy' issue when in reality it is simply a person female genitalia and a womb having a baby, which isn't actually crazy or infact newsworthy in any way whatsoever.


Quote:
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This sounds like exactly the kind of thing that happens after 50 years of family breakdown. I mean this is a mess and feel sorry for kids in a situation like this because its confusing and a real mind bender. Gender dysphoria is still classified as Gender Identity Disorder and the only reason to pretend its not would be for PC reasons. I have sympathy for the people who are caught in the situation but introducing children to such a situation is selfish imo.
Second, ****... I used to really respect and enjoy reading your input in threads. Now I just think you're a republican tool.





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Old 10-04-2011, 03:29 PM   #20
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In short, yes, and yes. Personally, I've nothing against either ftm pregnancies, or same sex parenthood.

But from a non-personal-opinion perspective, I suppose it will kind of depend on where you're living, because if it's in an open-minded Western country, it's fine, but in a more close-minded place, I would have concerns about the child's well-being re: bullying and discrimination. And from that perspective, I think it would be irresponsible for such parents to bring a child into a world where they know the child will have a hard time. But if that's fixed, then yeah.

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