Need help helping a friend! Please!

padfoot · 05-04-2011, 04:16 PM

Hello there, don't really no how this all works, but here goes. I've recently found out that a friend of mine has been self harming. I spoke to her about it and she said she hadn't done so in 4 months. So I (now naively I realise) thought that it would all be okay. She texted me about a week later saying she had slipped up. I really don't know where to go from here! I've tried to get her to tell her Mother but, she is adamantly against the idea. What should I do to help her?!?! I'm really lost on what course of action will actually aid her? Any advice?

tifflehan · 05-04-2011, 04:52 PM

YOU ARE A GREATFRIEND!!!

Maybe you could direct her here?

Laura2.0 · 05-04-2011, 04:53 PM

what tifflehan said: YOU ARE A GREAT FRIEND!!!

If I had a friend who knew about the SI I would want them to treat me as always. She has been doing it for a while and nothing changed, except that now you know.
Be there for her if she wants to talk and listen. Sometimes it is good to have someone who just listenes, even if they don't have much to say.

About the slip up: I wouldn't worry about it too much if I were you. Slip ups are to be expected and not uncommon when someone is trying to stop.

Hope this is helpful

The One Who · 05-04-2011, 04:59 PM

Don't focus on the self-harm. Try to get beyond that and ask why they feel the need to do it. So the feelings and emotions behind it, rather than the act itself.

PassedExpectations · 05-04-2011, 08:27 PM

if she isn't ready to tell her parents and you don't think shes in serious danger (going to need stitches, get bad infection, etc) then i think that it'd be best to let the decision to tell them come from her. but you could see if you can convince her to talk to a councelor at school. not even necessarily about the harm, but about whatever is causing her to harm and how to cope with it and her feelings in a healthy way.

try and be there for her. this doesn't mean to put yourself in a place that becomes unhealthy for you. but let her know that you're there and willing to help and listen. and definately remember that shes still the same person, you just know something new about her. still do whatever you enjoy doing together, and have normal conversations.