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My girlfriend? ran off with my two week old son
Hi,
I'm after advice. Basically my girlfriend and I suppose I'll use that term loosely now has ran off to her mum and dads with my son. My entire world has come crashing down since Tuesday morning.
It was all after an argument where I wouldn't get up after we stayed the night to take her mum to work - I have always done this in the past but I didn't want to. She says I'm getting the bus home, you just drive then. This is fine - it isn't until I get home that I then receive a text to say she's taking my son to her mum and dads for a few nights. As you can imagine as a new dad on paternity leave I wasn't best pleased at this news.
She gets home, asks for the car seat for her aunty so we can talk to resolve our issues. The only issue we have had up to this point is I haven't given her mum a lift to work. I refuse to give her the car seat also as we can resolve any issue we have with our son here. From no where she says "Well you know what the answer will be when you want to see your son in future then". I then say to her a solicitor will sort that out.
She storms off and leaves to go back to her mum and dads. Nothing is said all day and then she starts pleading with me to talk. I'm riled up at this point, I don't want to talk to her. She's got to me. Her dad leaves me a voicemail asking to sort it so she comes over the next day. We just argue again. This is when she takes my son to be registered that I don't know anything about - something we always said we would do together from the time we found out she was pregnant.
Before knowing about the registration, I send her dad a facebook message saying look she's left of her own accord, she needs to grow up and sort this out so she comes back without my son and wants to go out to talk as we always argue at the flat in her words. So I drive her to a near pub, I asked what she did when she left after we argued yesterday, she says about the registration. I didn't ask about the surname at this point but I was riled up again.
I get her lunch, it comes and she starts trying to emotionally blackmail me to come over to her mum and dads to see my son. I say he should be at home with me and you, not at your mum and dads. This is when shes says he is at his home and now I storm off back to the car, I let her get her bag in the car and say bye. She says no and says I want to talk about our son with you. I say well what do you want to talk about? She says "Are you really getting a solicitor". I say no (as I didn't believe it would ever come to this) and this is when the smug look on her face "Well at least one of us took some action by registering him". She has her hand on the boot, won't leave go so I push her (gently I'll add) away so I can drive away and which point she says "There's a camera there idiot, good luck getting anywhere with him now". Again I'm riled up.
Fast forward to 3pm yesterday, she calls me saying the health visitor needs to come at 9:45 today. I say fine so she comes over and plays happy families which was extremely difficult for me to do because we are anything but happy right now. This is where I find out shes given my son her surname - something we had never planned to do. She even had a Christmas stocking made especially with my surname. Again for the 4th day running she has me riled up and I'm meeting them at 14:35 for my son's hearing check where no doubt she'll rile me up again along with her mum.
What can I do to stay in control because I'm close to breaking point and I fear I'll snap. One thing I will say is she has lived here rent free from February due to pregnancy sickness and now she's left of her own accord but her name is on the rent book, I'm tempted to come after her for it but I want to see my son and I can't do that if I go down that road. What on earth can I do?
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