Not knowing

[tamobhuuta]

I'm worried my parents are at the end of their tether and will chuck me out. At first I thought they were using hyperbole but now I think they're serious.

[one_step_closer]

Can you speak to them about your worries?

[tamobhuuta]

I did. My mum said she wouldn't because it wouldn't help anyone.

[Zurg]

Tamo, generally with parents, they get upset and angry sometimes but as their kids, we can rarely ever do anything that would make them stop loving us or helping us <3

I hope you hear something soon because this whole ordeal with sitting in suspense and just having to wait is not really great for anyone in the long run.

[tamobhuuta]

Thank you Zurg.

I feel like a fraud for not constantly trying to take the implant out.

[Elmer]

So they've sectioned you but you're not being admitted? This all sounds very stressful and confusing, and definitely not fair on you. I hope that a bed is found soon.

[tamobhuuta]

Basically, yes. The Crisis Team person who just came round said they were searching "desperately" for a bed. It's nice that she feels strongly but really it's just a matter of the bed manager allocating beds.

[Pomegranate]

‘Liable to be detained’. You are not officially sectioned until the paperwork is handed over to the hospital with the bed. This status can last two weeks from the MHA. It’s a really shitty situation for you to be in Tamo. I’m sorry. I hope they find a bed soon. Well done for all your efforts the last few days. Must be so bloody difficult x

[tamobhuuta]

I didn't know they only had 2 weeks, thanks for that Pomegranate, and thanks for your support.

[tamobhuuta]

It all makes sense! The Man, the Organisation, the Evil. They're trying to make me doubt myself but this morning it's oh so clear. I just don't know what to do about it!

Edit
Maybe getting rid of the implant isn't right? Maybe I need to get rid of me?

I'm not going to kill myself.

[tamobhuuta]

The clarity's gone, I'm confused.

[Elmer]

This all sounds very distressing and confusing. Will you be seeing crisis team today? I hope that you're safe.

[tamobhuuta]

Yes, they're coming round between 1 and 6. I don't know what to tell them, my head is whirring.

[tamobhuuta]

I used my cbt therapy. Looking at theory A and theory b, evidence, how much you believe each. Turns out, after looking at the evidence, I belief both theories more....

[one_step_closer]

Is maybe thinking deeply about all of this making things more confusing and making you more distressed? I know at times it can be helpful but maybe it's too much right now. I hope you can mention things to crisis and they are helpful.

[tamobhuuta]

Thanks osc. I am finding thinking overwhelming! More tv it is!

[one_step_closer]

Are you getting any support today?

[tamobhuuta]

I think someone from the Crisis Team is coming this afternoon. I think they have to see me while they wait for a bed. The lady who came yesterday said it might me her again. I didn't really get on with her but she was alright.

[one_step_closer]

Will you be able to talk to her though?

[tamobhuuta]

I don't think so. Sorry, that's not the right answer...