:DontKnowWhatToPutAsTitle:

[*unlovedmonkey*]

Is it normal to get flashbacks when your OH or someone close to you touches you or even gives you a simple hug? flashbacks of things that happened when you was just soo little things that seem to have scarred you for life. i just keep getting little panic attacks and have to stop things between us and its hurting me..

So is this a normal thing or is there something wrong with me?

[typsee]

If you've had abusive trauma in your past that you are still trying to come to terms with, then what you are going through now with regards to these flashbacks, is completely normal given your experience.

I know that this is a small comfort when you are having these sorts of problems and cant endure the touch of someone that you love and trust because you are plagued by anxiety and flashbacks, but unfortunately, flashbacks of this sort are very common for survivors of abuse.

I'm not sure what 'OH' stands for, but if you are in a loving, trusting relationship with a person who understands what you are going through, then that at least that is the best sort of environment for you to work on these difficulties that you have with touch.

A supportive partner who respects your wishes and only wants the best for you, can take things slow and allow the touch to progress at your pace and only when you are comfortable with it.

I know that a big problem for me is when I am hugged or approached by someone by surprise and I'm not ready for it - that can often trigger a flashback or panic attack for me - but having a close friend or supportive partner who knows about the problems a person faces, allows for communication and understanding, and the other person can adapt their behaviour to meet your needs.

I wish you all the best with this monkey!

Take care xxx

[Popple]

^^ Well I can't really add to that.
But I just wanted to let you know there is nothing wrong with its perfectly normal I know alot of people including me who that happens to and its nothing to be ashamed of and as you work through your problems and start to feel better in yourself then they will hopefully subside.

take care beautiful
katy
xx

[Chrissyann]

It's very normal for people who have suffered abuse to feel this way, especially if you haven't received any help for what happened. Being abused tends to make you scared of touch due to the fact that it was via touch that you were hurt.

I can't really add much to what's been said already, I just want to let you know that I've had the same problem. It took me a good few months to allow my ex to get near me. Even holding hands.. which is simple to most people.. was difficult for me. The further things progressed in the relationship, the more problems we were having. Luckily for me, he seemed to be understanding. However, now we've split up due to my behaviour, I really do wish that I'd tried to get help to make it work.

Talk to your other half and let him in as much as you can. Allow him to be there for you. And if you feel strong enough, you can try and find help to get you through it.

Take care
*hugs*
Chrissy
xxx

[Spoons]

its a normal thing to happen if you have been through abuse. Your not alone in that. Typsee covered pretty much all the bases.
hope your ok.
stay safe and take care
amy
xxx