So basically I quit SI for almost 4 years and started again about 9 months ago (I know right? ) I don't know if it's related to starting up again or just to a dip in mood/general mental stability (lulz), but more recently I've started to get really bad flashbacks to when I used to SI before. In particular I get them for particularly deep cuts/sets of cuts which just makes it all the more gruesome.
As well as images or memories or whatever they are, I almost feel as though I can 'feel' it? It's not painful exactly but I don't know how to describe it.
The entire thing is getting to be really distressing, so I guess I was wondering if anyone else gets this and more importantly how you deal with it? It comes on really randomly and quickly and intensely so a lot of distractions and the like aren't all that effective. I sort of need stuff to distract from both the images and the 'feeling' part as well, as I get overwhelmed by it pretty quickly then just feel like I'm going to pass out. All the fun!
I get flashbacks of a few rather unpleasant experiences and, to be honest, I have only one way of dealing with them, and that is to self-harm. I'm still looking for another way to cope but I haven't found one yet.
I'm sorry I can't give you a way to cope, however, you're not on your own in this
I've never had flashbacks of self harm, but I have had flashbacks of other things. They can be very distressing and I'm sorry you are going through this. My coping strategy used to be to self harm, but I try to think of a really strong emotion. This may sound strange but thinking of a strong happy or pleasant emotion really helped me as it brought be back to real life in a way which gave me good memories so I didn't feel as distressed.
Do you have anyone who you can talk to about this?
Have you ever looked fear in the face and said "I just don't care"?
Strong emotions, whether they are good or bad, often lead to me self-harming, because I just can't cope.
I only have friends online I can talk to about anything
Hey there emma. ive been dealing with flashbacks of self harm as well as other things for a while now. for one thing, i want you to realize that you are absolutely not alone!
now ive found a few coping stratagies that have been helping me get through them lately. i find that for me, i drown the memories out with music. just focusing on the music can be hard at first, but soon enough it worked, and now i find it to be very helpful.
another one i find helpful is to face the issue head on. i suggest only doing this if you are in a safe place though. what i have done is ive drawn a picture or written poetry. i find that being creative really helps in times of distress
or if you dont want to face it, and just need a distraction, you could just color a random picture/draw, but focus on doing it perfectly inside the lines., anything to get your mind off of the feelings, you know?
well i have some more, but i dont want to bore you haha, but if those dont work, im always here to suggest more (:
best of luck to you darling(:
I just want to be okay again
i dont care what i takes
i know itll be hard
but i need to feel safe again
i know itll be worth it
when i finally reach
recovery http://www.recoveryourlife.com/forum...e=136338 7134
Two things really sprang to my mind when I read this. The first is whether these occur truly randomly or at moments where you are about to self-harm/thinking about self-harming? If you can identify any patterns at all to when the flashbacks come on, that could be helpful. It also makes it easier to have specific 'go-to' distractions, or put preventative measures in place.
The second question is whether these flashbacks actually serve to scare you from future self-harm? I know you said you've relapsed, but how have these experiences affected things? Flashbacks tend to be of traumatic events and memories. It seems like this could be a kind of 'warning' against doing any severe injuries again in the future.
I can relate and I know it's difficult to cope with. I find that I experience some anxiety now around self-harming based on previous events, and it can be really helpful to hold onto the fact that it's a healthier response than actually hurting yourself! The key is to reduce the distress the flashbacks bring, whilst still taking on board the fact that it's okay to feel anxious about hurting yourself.
) I don't know if it's related to starting up again or just to a dip in mood/general mental stability (lulz), but more recently I've started to get really bad flashbacks to when I used to SI before. In particular I get them for particularly deep cuts/sets of cuts which just makes it all the more gruesome.
