Ive just ordered £563 worth of clothes due to arrive tomorrow...bit of my wreckless spending coming out...but most will be sent back tomorrow.
So the positive is, that receiving it all will make me happy, but that i do realise i cant keep it all
Well done Rosa that was really brave :) How do you feel about it today?
Rowie I know things are really difficult at the moment *super hugs*. Are you going to take the stuff K got you to your sisters with you or anything to keep you occupied during the day when they are at work? Have you got any activites planned with your sister that you could try and look forward to? I'm glad your meeting with A was more positive this time. I hope she is helpful next time you see her as well.
How are you doing Tig? How is the moving going?
Mark well done for going to your assessment, I know you were dreading it. Try not to worry too much about the outcome at the moment. Did your social worker say anything after it?
Lorraine, thanks for letting us know. I hope things get sorted soon.
Cheryl- I'm sorry for not replying to your PM last night, I was absolutely exhausted by the time I got home. I think what you said P mentioned a couple of pages back is interesting. I guess he means that maybe once the pressure of uni is removed then things may get a little easier. Is there anyway you could get a room somewhere so you don't have to move back home though? Once you finish uni you would qualify for housing benefit to cover that if you did not have a job. P could probably help you to sort that out as well if it is something you would consider. I hope uni went ok today and you manage to get some sleep tonight.
How are you doing ferret? I hope the panto is going well *offers hugs*
Jenna- Nice to see you posting in here. Yay for the positives! Have you collected your stickers today? :p How are you doing otherwise? Apart from enjoying the poll spamming...
Mari- How are things with you? You seem to have been a little quieter than normal the last couple of days?
Laura, I saw from your r+v thread that things are not easy for you at the moment and maybe last night was especially rough. Please update or post when you can. Thinking about you x
*leaves hugs and cookies for anyone I have missed*
Uni went kind of ok yesterday, thank you for the support. I managed to stay for the full session just about and my mentor is coming on Monday with me whilst they try and sort out my seminar/lecture supporter. Feeling quite destructive today but going to try and make a dent in cleaning my flat.
*hugs Emma* I'm glad you're planning to riding out the destructive urges and clean instead, that's very wise :) I will hopefully be earning me a sticker today, as long as I eat my dinner and don't get into any mischief! [you know you're special when your housemate says "be good!" when you leave the house on a morning :p]
Thank you Emma...i am so proud of your for sticking at your seminar, that must have been so hard...so well done hun...Cleaning sounds like a good plan...xx
I too feel that way and have opted to go with t when he takes f to physics so im not on my own.
But thank you..things really arent good right now...we had a good morning taking photos so that was good, and thats what i really cant understand. But yes my eldest daughter bought me a card malking kit, a colouring book and a puzzle book and a weekly planner with things on it like ..get up at 10, wash hair, pamper yourself, card making, a walk with t etc and because she has made somuch effort for me..i really am trying to stick to it...but like painting nails was with clear nail polish...but i still did it...the though that must have gone into doing all of that...i cant not try...and i see that i am spending less time on ryl and managing to do small things around the house.....anyway enough about all of this...but thankyou...yes it will all be going with me to keep me occupied and ive had to make a promise so...yeah
Mark, I hope your coffee went well xx
Hugs to Laura and Lotti and to Carrie...thinking of you all
And good to see you Jenna...well done on your coursework and attending most of your lectures....xx
Hope youre ok Rosa, and safe xx
I really am in awe of all of you who are studying...this evening i got in a panic over how to cook rice and t had to write down step by step instructions....
Oh. and as for the clothes, some i will keep, most will go back...i just feel i need to look 'normal' whilst at my sisters...so in my head a few bits are needed because giving her any washing to do is a HUGE no for me...even at home its hard to...anyway...i dont talk for days then dont shutup
P could probably help you to sort that out as well if it is something you would consider. I hope uni went ok today and you manage to get some sleep tonight.
hi em its ok yeh it was really late sorry... i guess so but at the same time im better when im at uni i dont really wanna move home but ive got to :( no not that i would be able to afford im hoping to get some work in a school.. i hope i do cus otherwise i wud go sturr crazy... yeh maybe ill talk to him see what he can do i dunno if living on my own wud be a good idea though... 1 assignment nearly finished thanks to my mentor just another 17000 words to go....
glad u managed to go to uni and ur gona get the support next week.. hope cleaning help ive gota do my uni room looks like a bomb has hit it lol
Wow, Emma, that was a mammoth post, and very kind of you to think about us all. I'm glad Uni was bearable and that they're going to support you some more. I think you're really brave to keep going. Putting a dent in your flat cleaning sounds like a good idea - I am in much the same boat! *Sends hugs*.
Jenna, it's nice when people tell you to be good/take care. I find it extra-motivating in, well, being good! I hope you manage your sticker today :)
Emma, I am a bit better today thanks. I'm sorry if I worried you. It was a difficult night and had a bit of a blip with the self harm thing but nothing major. Not looking forward to bringing it to the group on Monday but them's the rules. Saw my OT and we felt I am a lot better than last week.
*Hugs Rowie* thank you. Big well done for trying to keep to you and your daughter's plan to take care of yourself a bit. I know it's not easy for you but I'm sure she'll really appreciate it. I know a lot of people who struggle after a period of feeling better, even if it's only a short one. I don't know why, maybe because it's so rare to feel sometimes.
Cheryl, 17000 words, wow! Well done on managing to get an assignment done.
Lots of successes in the thread today :) *hugs everyone and throws out marshmallows*.
*puts on stern face* no mischief Jenna! And yay for being 'special' :p
I'm glad you had a good morning taking photos with T Rowie and well done on the cooking. I'm sure your family can see how hard you are trying with things.
Well done on your assignment Cheryl. Mentors are very helpful inventions aren't they? :p Living on your own is a big adjustment but maybe living in a shared house would not be quite so tough if it was possible? I found it helpful in the past to have to consider my housemates reactions when I was struggling with OD thoughts etc. i.e I could overdose but they would likely find out because of the ambulance etc. At the same time it gave me some independence. I live in a flat now but after an incident at my last flat (police breaking down my door) I find I am wary about ODing or anything because I don't want my neighbours to find out and think I'm weird.
It's ok Laura. I wasn't sure whether to PM you or whether you would prefer to be left alone to try and work through your reaction or thoughts about it yourself. I'm glad your OT and you feel things are a little better than last week and I hope group goes ok on Monday. Do you have anything nice planned for the weekend?
Mark, I think after anything stressful, especially something that has been building up for a while like your assessment yesterday, it is normal to feel a bit weird afterwards. Try and be gentle with yourself though. Is there anything nice you sometimes do that helps? I find painting my nails helps although maybe you are not into that...
Carrie if you see this then I am thinking of you and hoping things are going ok x
I have kind of started my flat. I did some washing up, some laundry and took the rubbish out. I guess it is better than nothing. I also went to the shop (in my pjs mind you) to get some cigarettes but unfortunately got rather distracted by wine. Now I'm contemplating getting hammered. Hmmm. Maybe I will have a shower and paint my nails (not at the same time) whilst I decide. I am thinking pink and blue, they are currently alternating green and purple. Not that anyone needed to know that...
I'm at my friends flat and I am struggling a lot with my anger.
Her kid is driving me mad, its like everything anyone does is just pissing me off.
My potential girlfriend said that my disorders not a problem to her, so now Im dying to hear from her. I've got attached to her haven't I? I hate this. Ive known her like 2 weeks. I hate how this happens so fast.
What do you think would happen if you did not hear from her? What would it mean?
Have you tried challenging any of the thoughts or emotions you have when you start to get angry? Like asking yourself why you are feeling like that/if the reason and your reaction to it makes sense/what you could think instead etc?
Emma, thank you for asking how I am. I'm not too bad, the move is keeping me busy and it's not going too badly. Done a lot of the painting today. :) Hope you are as okay as possible. xx
Alcohol Helps me , Or blows my mind out of the water , I once woke up to the message " Don't answer the phone" on my wall, no clue as to what happened that night
I'm still not comfortable in my skin and the anasthetic's slowly wearing thin - Otep
Everyones lost but me! - Indiana Jones
It's okay , they know me here .
Kahlia1981 is my adopted little sister :)
''Courage doesn't always roar , sometimes courage is that little voice at the end of the day that says I'll try again tomorrow"
I have no clue why it would matter. Maybe because I think she'd make a good girlfriend and I'm sick of being alone. When I started talking to her and started to like her a bit I really wanted it to work. Maybe not be a forever thing, I don't look that far ahead. But I wanted it to amount to something. I have never been in a meaningful relationship.
I don't know if alcohol helps. All I know is that when I get emotional I have this urge to drink myself silly. I don't know where it's come from.
