Triggering (Sexual Abuse) - <rant> (sorry) [hugs are welcome]

[ghosts in the machine]

So if being s*xually abused twice in my life isn't enough... someone desides to throw in a r*pe for me to deal with.. hey let's give her an STI while we're at it... and now tonight some other guy tries it on with me.

Seriously, can I not walk through this town without SOMEONE trying to get in my pants?! Walking home from the shops, is that a ****ing invitation for guys to try whatever they like with me? Such a ****ing idiot, I swear, I'm so stupid.

Do I have a sign on my head that just says "**** me"? Why did it have to happen again? And now I just want a drink, I want the thoughts and images to stop. I have a test to revise for tomorrow morning and I can't concentrate and this is going to go very wrong.

I don't know why I bother.

[Chrissyann]

Hunni, this is going to be a pants reply, because I can't bring myself to read your post... I'm not in a great place at the moment... but I see you wanted hugs.... *holds you tight and doesn't let go*
Sorry I can't do more.
*more hugs*
Chrissy
xxx

[crazykat]

No matter what hunny none of this is your fault, noone deserves to be treated like that. I am so sorry that you had to go throiugh all of that. I know how you feel about having a sign on your head, I feel like that too sometimes. I promise you that you do not have a sign on your head, even if you did it is not a reason for guys to take advantage of you. Be take care of yourself and be gentle with yourself. Hang in there
Kat xxx

[mesmerized.]

*offers hugs*

It's not your fault, you're not stupid. The people who have hurt you are the ones to blame. I'm sure you would say the same to anyone else in your situation, and while I know it's harder to apply that to yourself, it's still true. Just, try not to blame yourself, you don't deserve it in the slightest.

Try not to worry too much about the test tomorrow, taking care of yourself is more important. Maybe just go and do something to take your mind off it a bit, try and relax. I hope it goes alright, through.

I'm sorry I don't have anything useful to say right now. But I'm around if you need someone. Take care of yourself xo

[((deleted))]

*cuddles* i don't know what to say really. but *offers bucket load of hugs for you*

[ghosts in the machine]

Thanks for the replies and hugs... I'm sorry about last night.. it just spooked me a bit.