I just dont know what to do. My mom has made me promise to her to not SI so many times I hate it. Every time like a idiot I just say "ok" I mean what am I going to say? "ummm well I don't think I can do that, see yah!" the urges to cut are just so strong atm. I would normally just try the five minute thing or a rubber band but I snap the band to much and it makes a small cut anyway :/ and the 5 minute rule just almost makes me think about it more. And seeing that I just got out of the hospital I would just be sent there again. And to tell u the truth the hospital scares the **** out of me.....
I know how hard it can be when you've promised people in your life that you will stop harming. Would you mind explaining a bit about what is causing you to want to hurt yourself? Maybe we can try to help you find more positive ways to get through the times that you're triggered. Also, if you don't already, you can try to do something that you enjoy (that isn't harmful) to help take your mind off of the bad thoughts when you are doing the minute thing or anytime you don't feel well.
Maybe try to explain to her how hard it is, and have her try to help?
"I don't know why i cut myself, god, give me a sign or help, i won't cry, it'll be fine, ill take my last breath, push it out my chest, till there's nothing left."
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Hollywood undead
change the promise. explain that promising not to harm makes it worse because in increases the pressure and guilt attached to something that is already very persuasive and compelling. instead, work together to make a plan, step by step, very specific, of what you will do to avoid harming yourself. include who you will call if you really need help. then your promise is to follow the plan when you get an urge....
this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.
The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.
have you given her information about self harm? many sources will expressly say not to do that...
*hugs* i would feel awful too, but, remember, you are in control of what you do. what she does is her decision. you do not make her do anything. if she hurts herself, that was her choice.
however, i would try to get her away from that idea of how to "fix" things..
this is my magical medicine cabinet. Left to right they contain: courage, hope, calmness, and strength.
The magical part: They NEVER run out, so borrow some any time you want.
hey hun *hugs* promises do suck i have the same one to my boyfriend. Its killing me but in the same sense it makes us stronger because WE HAVE to control the urges, people want us to stop because THEY CARE about us. Do explain urges though it does help - because my bf knows when they are going to come (permanent atm tho) and he can talk me through it. Maybe find an activity you and your mum could do when your triggered to distract yourself? She loves you dearly and doesnt want to see you hurting anymore xx
