A/B FAQ: My parents used to hit me when I was a kid. Was this child abuse?

[troubleshooter]

Corporal punishment is legal in most countries, save for a select few like Sweden. However, social acceptability of corporal punishment has changed over the years. Many people have experienced a spanking or slap in the face for talking back, fighting with siblings or other childhood naughtiness. While this may not be the best way to deal with discipline, it doesn’t always mean that person was abused. However, with more liberal views today some people wonder whether or not the punishments they experienced as children were abuse.

While it may not be as reassuring as it should be, the laws on the line between discipline and abuse are a bit hazy. Generally it is stated that spanking children on the bottom with an opened palm is the accepted corporal punishment. However, some signs that your being hit was abuse are some of the following:
-bruises, welts, cuts or scars were left on your body
-your daily life and functioning is affected (This is one of the legal American lines between discipline and abuse. An example of your “daily life and functioning” being affected would be being so sore and bruised the day(s) after being hit that you were unable to sit in your desk at school or play at recess.)
-you were hit with objects such as belts, switches, hangers, electrical cords, or paddles
-you were hit through your teenage years and even into your early 20’s
-you were hit without any actual cause (ex: you could not recall doing anything wrong or did not know why you were being hit)

While some of the above might be hazy there are some things that are definite indicators of abuse. If you can say yes to any of the following with your experiences, then you were definitely abused.
-if you were ever thrown against a wall/the floor/down stairs, burned or scalded, punched, kicked, choked, knocked unconscious, bled profusely, had bones broken, stabbed/cut, starved, or tied up.
-if you were hit every day, almost every day or several times a day
-if you were ever locked in a closet, cupboard or other small space for an extended period (ex: hours, days, weeks)
-if you ever needed to be taken to the hospital
-if you were told or needed to make up false explanations for marks on your body

[crazykat]

*Bumps* Thanks for this

[thefool]

Great piece of information.

[whirlpools]

This is good. Thank you. I agree that discipline by smacking children on the bottom with an open palm was socially acceptable years ago, and, although I would choose not to physically discipline my children at all, that it wasn't seen as abuse back then.

But I think, even shutting a child in a small space for a couple of minutes, is abuse, and would likely be terrifying. Don't know why I feel particularly strongly about clarifying that one (from my opinion). Though I appreciate this is a guideline.

[troubleshooter]

*bump*

[Frail Existence]

Both a *Bump* and comment/question...
So... Lately I have been questioning if my adopted dad is/was... abusive. Without going into much detail, times I have been sent to the hospital because of him where he tried to make up what happened. Though I do remember them asking me and I would tell them, yet they never did anything. Because of that, never perceived it as wrong of my dad. Therfore, he had that right. Our relationship still isnt that great but it isnt as often. Does consistent yelling count as uhh... abuse in any way?

Thanks Troubleshooter :)

[troubleshooter]

If he hurt you so bad you needed a hospital visit, that's abuse! *hugs* It should have been reported if you were hurt that bad, seriously.

[Frail Existence]

I had told the nurses at the hospital what had really happened but I guess they didnt believe me or something cause no actio was taken. *Hugs back* Thanks.

[troubleshooter]

Forgive my language but that's bullshit. She should have lost her job for not reporting that. In many states you can lose your job for not reporting child abuse. *hugs*

[troubleshooter]

*bump*

[on edge]

i dont think the hospitals care really, i was taken several times after being beaten, thrown down stairs or burnt with the iron and no one believed me when i said mummy got mad. mummy used to say she just a clumsy child. but i never have been clumsy, never.

[troubleshooter]

It depends on the hospital and people working there. They are SUPPOSED to care and do something, but some people are negligent.

[gloriacollins]

great post.. i came to read blog on essay on abuse which tells about different types of abuse. so i thought to share it here.. I believe sharing is caring..:)

[troubleshooter]

*bump*