IP DBT, feeling scared. advice?

Cedrus · 29-12-2015, 08:54 AM

I'm meant to be going to one of the cygnet hospitals once i leave here for ip dbt and im really quite frightened. I dont think I have a PD and i don't even think thats me being in denial but my team are convinced i do.

Regarding the cygnet i keep going back and forth in my head about whether its the best thing, however, they are trying to keep me on S3 so that i definitely go. I'm scared that the other people will be really ill and i'll be fine. or that its a waste of the funding.

I know i need *some* help though as the last 2 years i've been like a revolving door patient, ive lost count how many admissions on section i've had. so maybe i do need to go? But what if i get there, my section expires and i realise i don't need it. do i leave? but then there are people who really want this help who dont get it. the problem is i just cant comprehend that i have an illness which i guess doesnt correspond with all the hospital admissions.

Has anyone else done in-patient DBT? What's it like? I've only ever had psychotherapy.

I'm scared i'll be institutionalised.

Any advice, please?

Epicene · 29-12-2015, 10:52 AM

I'll try and reply to this properly when I have more words, but I just wanted to say that your concerns sound completely justifiable. That said, it also sounds like a great opportunity and it sounds like you don't have all that much to lose? I don't think you need to worry about all the ifs and maybes, because if it gets to the point where the section expires you would be able to make an informed choice having given it a go. I think of you a lot and really hope this offers you a different route into recovery.

sherlock holmes · 29-12-2015, 10:20 PM

DBT is a fantastic therapy, and it doesn't only help those who have a personality disorder. No matter what your diagnosis is, elements of DBT will be able to help you manage and ultimately cope without needing to be in hospital.

If you're on section and your team are pushing for this treatment then it doesn't sound like you're fine and will waste the funding. Usually on DBT wards the patients have similar issues and a similar level of wellness so hopefully there wont be anyone who is massively different to everyone else.

I've done inpatient DBT. It's the best way of having DBT as it's more intensive than in the community. There's lots to remember and practice with DBT and doing it in hospital means you get the encouragement and support to keep it up, whereas in the community it's easy just to stop doing it. If you put the time and effort in with DBT then it can really pay off. When I did it I was on a section 3 on a secure ward. I did 6 months of the therapy and was then well enough to be discharged home. I never had another hospital admission, and never self harmed badly enough for A&E again. My problems were not solved overnight but the DBT was definitely the turning point. Now I am discharged from my CMHT and holding down a job and studying.

Cedrus · 02-01-2016, 08:19 AM

Thanks for the replies and hope =] Night circus , im glad its had such an impact on you and that things are looking more positive for you now. I know that if i do go I will put my all in to it. I would have thought though that DBT would have been best done in the community where you can practice the skills with 'real life scenarios' but i guess you are right too that having it IP will help you keep up with it.

Thanks for understanding my concerns.

They are coming out on monday to assess me which im scared about. Now im scared they will say im too well for a placement there. I duno. Hopefully it goes okay! If they agree a bed should be ready in 4-6 weeks, but apparently im still psychotic and they need to 'treat' that first. i went back on the clozapine as the depot really didint suit me at all and im struggling with side effects but trying to actively combat them.

Cedrus · 03-01-2016, 10:45 AM

My assessment is tomorrow and im scared.

sherlock holmes · 03-01-2016, 04:25 PM

Cedrus, we're friends on facebook I think? My profile picture is me and my partner with our heads on our hands and my first name begins with S.

Try not to be scared. Remember that everyone wants you to get well and get the treatment that is right for you. Just be honest in the assessment and that will allow the right course of action to happen.

Pomegranate · 04-01-2016, 11:40 PM

I wish you all the best Cedrus. I know we've chatted a lot in the past. I hope you get the appropriate help x

secret squirrel · 06-01-2016, 12:52 PM

Hey Cedrus. Just wondering how the assessment went. I hope it went well. Thinking of you x

Cedrus · 07-01-2016, 09:32 PM

The assessment went okay i guess. Although I am frightened. They seem ultra strict especially with what items your allowed. Your not allowed your mobile if it has a camera or access to the internet. internet access on the computer has to be supervised. morning meds is at 7am!

but it gave me a bit of hope. i came back to the ward the other day and cried thinking how things could have got so bad that i need to go to specialist ip again but im trying to view it positively that it will help me regain some control.

im really frightened about integrating with the other girls though, thats the thing scaring me the most right now.

sounds like a good place though. you dont get leave taken away if you self harm as they dont want to institutionalise people it only happens if self harm is severe. but i dont know their definition of severe.

im gonna give it my all. according to staff on the ward im not ready to go because my psychosis isn't under control.... problem is the Researchers are real and will never go so i have no idea whats going to happen. i gotta wait to hear back from them to see if im accepted but my social worker said its like 99% sure ill go there.

your allowed your own tv and i can bring my playstation and dvds which is good. im gonna have to buy one of the old kindle type ones that dont have cameras so i can read as i have loads of kindle books on my tablet (i cant take the tablet due to the camera). She said they give you a phone so you can contact people but you need to put credit on it. if there are rules regarding times you can use the phone ill probably end up just using credit, if not ill try and get a rolling contract thing that you can end after a month.

sorry for rambling

secret squirrel · 13-01-2016, 08:33 AM

I'm so glad your assessment went well. It does sound like it could be intense but if it gives you the chance to break the cycle of hospital admissions and self harm then it's worth it. I dolid dbt in the community and it I still use the skills on my own. I really hope it works for you and gives you the opportunity to live a better life. X