I don't know how to make Love

[Doikers]

Because it will be making long when my partner visits . Love is for me Having Sex is not. How to I make it so she won't want''seeing too'? I Need it to be Gentle and sensitive and intimate and we basically slide together . Like in the film , which are the only sex ed I ever had. I need her, I will Die for her , Anything for her but the last time she wanted a **** and I had no idea , so have educated myself on porn but I still need it to be so intimate .. got 13 days together , help?

[HopeRises]

Epic has good advice. Start slow with baby steps. Your partner should understand. When your doing things ask her if it feels good/ tell her when something she is doing to you feels good etc. Communication is key. Plus it can be a real turn on.

I have never really watched porn but try not to 'educate yourself' with porn because a lot of it is fake/embelished or whatever. It isn't real life.

[mustang69]

Let me start by saying that the *only* person I have ever made love to is my husband. That statement is NOT one of judgment, rather one to make you aware of my life perspective. Many other perspectives are valid and may prove more valuable to you.

I hate to say it but making love is messy, clumsy, and beautiful all at the same time. Having never seen porn, I will assume porn looks the way it does because of retakes and editing like all video/movies you pay for. Epic and HopeRises are correct when they say communication and trust are keys to a wonderful experience. Not only do you and your partner want to be able to feel comfortable expressing your desires, you also want to feel comfortable to be able to say "no." "No" means not now, I'm not ready. It doesn't mean never; though you may never feel comfortable for whatever you are currently saying no to. And that is something a loving partner will understand. Not every encounter is going to be earth shattering. Most probably won't be and it will be enjoyable just the same because you are expressing love.

[sherlock holmes]

Films don't depict the reality of sex unfortunately. I've never had sex like in the films! And porn is also pretty fake, unless you watch some of the "female friendly" ones they can be a little more life like.

I would personally say not to have sex until you're 100% comfortable with just kissing, stroking and touching each other. It can take a while to get used to intimacy like that. You don't want to rush it, because when it comes to getting naked and having sex you don't want to just freeze and panic or get embarrassed as it makes it much harder to enjoy it and even orgasm.

You can make it romantic by putting some music on, getting comfortable on the sofa, maybe lighting some candles and just kissing and stroking each other. It should feel pleasurable and kind of warm in your genital area as you get aroused. Usually you'd be ready to have sex when that warm feeling feels almost overwhelming and you can just tell when you want to step it up a level and have sex. Don't rush, it's okay to spend days just at the first step kissing. Sex is very nice but it's not a goal, not all couples have sex. Some people take a long time to be ready for sex and that's okay. Some people never want to have sex. Do what's best for YOU and if your partner is right for you they will respect your feelings. Don't sleep with someone just because you think it's expected or they pressure you to. And the same goes the other way, never pressure anyone else into doing anything they don't want to.

Sex is always a bit awkward the first time you do it with someone, I've always found it easier to get under the covers and cuddle a bit more to relax. And yeah, sex can be messy, it can be funny (sometimes bodies rubbing together can make funny noises), it can be slow or quick or frantic. It's also something that gets better over time as you learn what your partner likes and they learn what you like.

Orgasming is also nice, but I think sex is better if you don't make orgasming something you focus on. Not everyone orgasms from penetrative sex (I don't) and it can ruin the mood if someone is hell bent on making me come or if I fixate on it. I do other things to have an orgasm but I can make that part of the whole sexual experience with my partner and its nice.