Please pretend I'm not a bad person for the duration of this thread.

[RhapsodyInBlue]

Hi everyone.

I'm bisexual. But not comfortable with it and very few people know. I currently have a boyfriend of two years.

On Saturday I kissed a girl. She has asked me on a date. I really want to go.

But I love my boyfriend to pieces. I don't want to hurt him but I feel trapped. I'm only 21, I don't want to be settled down with the person I'm going to spend the rest of my life. I want to have fun, I want to have the excitement of dating different people. I wish I could meet my boyfriend in a few years when I'd be ready to settle down. Or I wish he was my best friend. If I break up with him, I'll really miss him.

I know I'm a bad person for going behind his back. But my head is bursting with confusing sexuality stuff.

Any advice would be great.

Thanks.

[DustyChica]

It seems to me that, if you were kissing someone else while you were dating this boy, you might not feel as strongly about him as you think you do to begin with. There's a saying that goes something like "If you love two people at the same time, pick the second one because if you really loved the first, you wouldn't have fallen for the second." I'm not discounting your feelings for your boyfriend or saying that you're in love with this girl, but it's something to think about.

Beyond that, I'd consider the ramifications of breaking up with your boyfriend. You do have quite a history with him. Do you think he'd be agreeable to taking a break to "see other people"? If you think he'd be okay with it, go for it. If you doubt that you'd be able to get back with him, then you really have to figure out how strongly you feel about him and whether you're willing to give that up or not.

I'm sorry if this isn't very helpful. I'm just trying to think about what I would feel if I were in that situation. :/

[mizz_devilish]

Hi =)

I'm bisexual myself so i understand the confusing feelings that come with it. It's hard enough having a boyfriend and being attracted to other boys but when your attracted to other girls too it can all get a bit messy and confusing. Personally i think it some ways you've answered the question yourself. You are only 21 and want to go out and have fun and try new things and personally i think that wuld be good for you.

You have been with your boyfriend a long time so you have a lot of history together but do you love him or have you just got used to him being there and being in a relationship with him? I think you should break up or take a break from each other at least and go out and have fun and try new things. It might help answer some questions you probably have regarding your own sexuality and if your really meant to be with your boyfriend i'm sure you'll find a way back to each other.

Just my personal opinion but hope it helps x

[RhapsodyInBlue]

Thank you so much for both replies, they are really helpful. I suppose I need to talk to him, but I'm scared.

[mizz_devilish]

Don't be scared of course its a bit of an awkward conversation and you have to be prepared that this could be the end for you two but it's better your open and honest with him and i think it shows you've clearly made the decision for yourself about what you want. Good luck! Please keep me updated on your story x