Contains abuse - the holiday

[Darkwings44]

my cousin said before he came over for Christmas that i was a retard......and worthless......and stupid and everything my dad has ever told me was true.... so when he came over i kept on thinking about what he said.......

[Darkwings44]

im still triggered i self harmed three times yesterday i thought that was going to be enough to get me through it but i still have his words in my head!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! and im still needing to cut!!!!!!!!!! and i cant take a tool with me back to the group home where i live!!!!!! ( im going back there today) i totally dont know what to do!!!!!!!!!

[Darkwings44]

these last few days has been nothing but pure hell!!! ive been self harming alot!!!!! i feel extremely dusgusted with me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I HATE ME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

[Darkwings44]

i go back home for the luner new year this weekend on friday...... and everyone in my family is going to be there...... i really want buy a razor ahead of time so i can be ready for the weekend with my family but i cant because im not allowed in stores by myself and even if i went to a store i dont think the staff will let me buy a razor......

[long road]

I hope today and the weekend goes ok. Happy Lunar New Year!

How is your relationship with your family?

I understand how a razor can be tempting to help you cope but it's probably a good thing you can't get hold of one. Have you got any coping techniques you can try instead of self harm like grounding techniques or distractions like music or writing?

[Darkwings44]

thank you

mostly bad but somewhat good i guess......

i did listen to music