To all the people who post Facebook statuses like: "is doing maths homework .... makes me want to shoot myself :/" - It's really not something to joke about you know. It just makes me want to hit you.
To her - I know. I wish I could tell you that I know, but then you wouldn't trust him anymore and that really wouldn't be good. I want you to know that I don't hate you for it. I don't think about you any differently, I swear. At least, I don't think I do.
To him - I love you. I don't really know what else to say.
To them - I hope you realise how much of my feeling shit is your fault.
I welcome the sunshine, not because it’s a promise of good weather, but because it means I can wear my sunglasses and hide behind them, to cry silent tears or to close my eyes and wish I was anywhere but in my own head.
Everyday I fantasise that the journey I take to get to work will be disrupted somehow; that the train derails or I get hit by a car or a bus crossing the road. I just want to go to sleep for a while, wake up and for the mental pain to have just disappeared somehow.
Sometimes I feel like I’m trying really hard to lift myself out of this depression, but mostly I know that it’s just the change in my circumstances that’s allowing me to function again. I’m painfully aware that I haven’t learned how to cope healthily with setbacks and that I’m constantly teetering on the edge of falling hard again.
I’m tired of feeling so tired.
I don’t know if I can ever have a day when this depression doesn’t rear its ugly head. Its always there, waiting. Waiting for me to wake up, waiting for me to finish work, waiting for me to be on my own, waiting to attack.
Please come back. Its not the you being away, its the not being able to even text you. Each time you go it makes me realise Im more dependant on you than I ever thought I would be.
Sarah: Give me the child.
Jareth: Sarah beware. I have been generous up till now. I can be cruel.
Sarah: Generous? What have you done that's generous?
Jareth: Everything! Everything you have wanted I have done. You asked the child be taken, I took him. You cowered before me, I was frightening. I have reordered time. I have turned the world upside down, and I have done it all for you! I am exhausted from living up to your expectations of me. Isn't that generous?
You can hate me,, or argue me with,, or do anything you want with/to me.
But you have no right to upset him. Don't bring him into this.
Please. He's my life...
i hate it when you lie to me.....i know you were lying.....you hadn't opened it last night.....must of been this morning.....i haven't had any of it.....why do you lie when you've been caught out.....
I'm friends with the monster that's under my bed
Get along with the voices inside of my head
You're trying to save me, stop holding your breath
And you think I'm crazy, yeah, you think I'm crazy
ugh. i dont know what to say to you at the moment. for once, i dont know how to make things better?
normally i can blag it...not this time.
you dont realise how much it hurts me when you do that. how much it fucking rips me to shreds inside. its complete and utter agony just...not knowing...
my belly and leg hurts. i hope it might sway you a little... or at least make you think twice.
then again... probably not eh?
i dont know what to do anymore. and i think im going insane.
stop asking me stupid questions. i do know why i do it but i can't tell you because they're watching me & if you don't keep your nose out, you'll make it worse.
Take all your chances while you can,
You never know when they'll pass you by.
❤
I'm terrified that everyone is going to leave me.
I wish I was dead.
My "best friend" from home is emotionally abusing me. I don't want her to stop because I know that I deserve it :/
Another day - Another play - Mold the clay
Straighten it out -Make it lay - Breathe upon the living creature Lungs burn - Heart pumps - Fingers twitch - Becomes alive -
So pardon me while I burst into flames.
I've had enough of the world and it's people's mindless games.
So pardon me while I burn and rise above the flame.
Pardon me, pardon me....I'll never be the same. -Pardon Me- Incubus
