This morning I looked at the scale and the number was lower than it was yesterday. I was just as disappointed. Does this mean the ED is coming back?
I'm scared, but god, I hope so.
It's the children the world almost breaks that grow up to save it.
-Frank Warren
I wish my heart would stop completely already..instead of doing this and causing me to double over in pain....I don't want to die yet, but if it makes this pain stop I'm ok with that
“Because everything that goes around comes around. Maybe it's luck or maybe it's fate, but either way, it comes back around."
Rest in Love Sar-sis. I'll see you the next time around hopefully <3 12/11/92-05/18/16
AJs mommy ❤️ 11/26/17
Married to my best friend and Soulmate 3/5/18 ❤️💍
as much as i want to stop starving myself and purging im getting the biggest kick out of it, and i dont think im going to stop!
" my precious, precious child, I love you and I would never, never leave you during your times of trials and suffering. When you see only one set of footprints it was then that I carried you" you were carried out of are lifes into the next and when its my time to leave this life I know i will be carried into the next life with you.
I wish i had my world complete again.
'Can we protend that airplanes in the night sky are like shooting stars, i could really use a wish right now' BoB
I am so triggered to go back to all my old coping mechanisms. I am so triggered by it all.
But I will loose everything that matters to me if I do. Literally, it isn't worth it rationally but irationally I wanna cut, purge and exercise and starve and od.
"If only everyone could know and live with their inner craziness…people would be fairer and happier." Paulo Coelho
something just occured to me...
in the event of your death in a few years....I'm going to just admit myself into a ward
because I won't be able to handle that at all
but it's ok...becaue I will eventually see you soon then.
“Because everything that goes around comes around. Maybe it's luck or maybe it's fate, but either way, it comes back around."
Rest in Love Sar-sis. I'll see you the next time around hopefully <3 12/11/92-05/18/16
AJs mommy ❤️ 11/26/17
Married to my best friend and Soulmate 3/5/18 ❤️💍
I don't want to go to the wedding.
I don't want to fake being happy.
I can't.
I'm suicidal, okay? That's what I meant when I said I didn't feel well.
I was going to kill myself last night but that would ruin the wedding for everyone else.
So please.
Just let me stay home.
It's the children the world almost breaks that grow up to save it.
-Frank Warren
I made plans tonight...they arn't good ones
I really hate to leave you like this
“Because everything that goes around comes around. Maybe it's luck or maybe it's fate, but either way, it comes back around."
Rest in Love Sar-sis. I'll see you the next time around hopefully <3 12/11/92-05/18/16
AJs mommy ❤️ 11/26/17
Married to my best friend and Soulmate 3/5/18 ❤️💍
Ive stopped trying. It's been over 10 years now. What's the point
"The body faught to survive, it evacuated toxins in any way it knew how. It made clots to stop the bleeding.Bones would find the quickest ways to heal themselves. It made scar tissue. In the face of violence towards it, it would become violent. It was amazing, yet excruciating. "
I really hate that I'm going to want to try taht again soon....
what is wrong with me???
“Because everything that goes around comes around. Maybe it's luck or maybe it's fate, but either way, it comes back around."
Rest in Love Sar-sis. I'll see you the next time around hopefully <3 12/11/92-05/18/16
AJs mommy ❤️ 11/26/17
Married to my best friend and Soulmate 3/5/18 ❤️💍
I lied
I did find my blade
I did unpack it
and I did cut
several times...
and I felt I had to lie to you because...I would disappoint you if I told you otherwise
and here's another thing...
it wa a fresh blade and they're deep
the bandana around my wrist is turning reder by the minute.
I'm so sorry
I told you I'm a mistake
“Because everything that goes around comes around. Maybe it's luck or maybe it's fate, but either way, it comes back around."
Rest in Love Sar-sis. I'll see you the next time around hopefully <3 12/11/92-05/18/16
AJs mommy ❤️ 11/26/17
Married to my best friend and Soulmate 3/5/18 ❤️💍
I broke my hand because I was frusterated with feeling so god damn helpless
it had nothing to do with my ex...
I hate that I can't help you...
I fucking hate it
and this you'll never know because I won't tell you how hurt it makes me when you're like this and you tell me that there's nothing I can do when there's got to be something!
“Because everything that goes around comes around. Maybe it's luck or maybe it's fate, but either way, it comes back around."
Rest in Love Sar-sis. I'll see you the next time around hopefully <3 12/11/92-05/18/16
AJs mommy ❤️ 11/26/17
Married to my best friend and Soulmate 3/5/18 ❤️💍
I feel alone. A good majority of the time. I'm so ugly in more ways than one it's over whelming sometimes. I think that the world would be better off without me blemishing the surface of it.
