I'm tired of waiting, it's so annoying, trying to keep it together when really I want to go nuts, harm myself, overdose, drink myself stupid.
5 months I've not self harmed, with no help from anyone, no CPN, no Psychiatrist, my GP didn't even have my notes the last time I saw him. I'm kind of thinking, a tiny part of me is thinking maybe I'm better alone, maybe it's better this way.
I have bald spots. LOL. That's why I'm a tad apprehensive to leave the house. I feel like my whole body is deteriorating. So much for being indestructible, I was delusional.
I couldn't tell you. I'm sorry, but I couldn't bring myself to tell you. And now I'm here all alone. And it's just sitting there. Waiting. Waiting for me to do it. Because once it's done all trace of me will be gone. But I'm sorry I couldn't bring myself to tell you.
if this makes me a horrible person i dont care..........your a pathetic excuse for a person. how he can bare to look at you never mind touch you is beyond me........you now seem to have my life, my house, the guy, and the baby on the way........and after everything you did you get all that?
i hope your life falls apart bit by bit...........one day he will realoise what you are and it will end, one day your child will look at you and shout i hate you, and one day you will know what you did to me you selfish bitch.
and when you die, i hope you rot in hell
It's killing me too
It's so wrong not to be with you
It's getting harder to stay awake It's killing me too
It stops my heart just to be with you
So listen cause you are the only one who cares to hear
I will do everything in my power to protect those children and if that means standing up for them in reviews and what not to prevent them coming back into your care, I'll do it! I'm not going to let you fuck them up! They are too precious for that to happen! Believe me, I am not on your side here and I don't care if it "tears you apart"
Life can be beautiful if you let it.
Step back, breathe and take it in
I dont believe love is real anymore, i've proven it to myself, I just cant believe its real it makes no sense , its only a matter of time till i dont believe in anything at all, but its fine I dont need to be able to feel anything anyways.
Take me away, I just want out from this self-imprisoned self-made Hell. Don't be surprsed, this is your mind coming to life by self-sacrifice. This tragedy of death will walk hand in hand with every thought of regret. Blame yourself for what you've become. The mind is a powerful thing set to self-destruct.
~I, Dementia - Whitechapel~
It's like I'm invisible.
Or don't exist.
Everywhere I go
Especially at home
I am nothing.
I don't matter.
I'm sure it's
my fault.
But there's always
that little voice
quietly wishing
i was somebody
Some of us fall by the wayside
Some of us soar to the stars
Some of us sail through our troubles
And some have to live with the scars
