I completely fail. 110% fail. attempted it last night & managed to tell him I feel guilty as **** about it & nothing else, sent him an email when he was at uni for him to read once he'd got home, he told me to speak once he'd got in & literally all I did for about 20-30 minutes was lay on him & cry. I feel pathetic as ****
I used to feel horribly guilty, I can really relate to how you're feeling. However much I was told it wasn't my fault, it was very hard not to find and place blame. Especially as so often you don't get a definite why or reason.
I know right now it is very hard not to find blame and not to feel guilty. But trust me when I say that this isn't your fault. There is no "fault". What has happened was not something within your control.
I'm sorry you weren't able to speak with your partner about what's happened, but perhaps right now crying is what you needed to do most. There's nothing pathetic about that. It's ok to be sad and it's ok to let yourself be sad.
Take care of yourself
X
You see a mouse trap
I see free cheese
And a ****ing challenge
I saw my mum earlier, the first time since I miscarried. I said to her that I'm craving fizzy drinks for god knows what reason, she turned around & said to me that I better not be pregnant. I know it shouldn't get to me so badly,, but I don't even want to be alive right now.
she knows I miscarried. she spent almost 2wks interrogating me which makes it all the more ****ed up. I'm so done with this whole life thing. its not fair.
I'm sorry to hear your mother made such a thoughtless comment. After my loss I had a number of people say things that hurt a lot. Do you think you'd be able to tell her how this comment and how her interrogation made you feel?
I'm sorry things are so hard right now <3
x x x
♥It's the ups and downs of living life this way. Promise me you'll never go away. Just stay with me through one more night because it's always darkest before the light and now I promise you I'll never turn away. I won't let you give us one less heart to break...♥
I think my mum picked up on interrogating me when I kindly told her to **** off with it. it's a month tomorrow & it seems to be getting shiitter rather than easier
I wish I had words, it's been two and a half years since mine and while it's gotten easier, it's never something that leaves.
x x x
♥It's the ups and downs of living life this way. Promise me you'll never go away. Just stay with me through one more night because it's always darkest before the light and now I promise you I'll never turn away. I won't let you give us one less heart to break...♥
I'm sorry you're having such a hard time! My Mum had a miscarriage and it really affected her. No one should have to go through something like this! Sending positive thoughts and lots of love your way. Hugs.
The following content has been hidden - Reason : **TRIGGER**
I am so stupidly suicidal over the whole thing, there's a bottle of morphine which lives on the side of our bed & I keep eyeing it up. my boyfriend knows how shitty things are but I feel at a complete dead end, I see no point any more.
I don't know what to do, there's a miscarriage/baby loss support thing not far from me but it deals with people who've got kids who are in need of practical help & apparently it all comes under the same bit. I don't even like going out because of babies/pregnant people :/
Hey, I don't know you but I couldn't not respond to this post but you are most definitely not alone!
How do I know this? Because I've been through it too, miscarriage is horrible and what hurts the most about it is that it is a forbidden topic and something that most women and/or couples suffer in silence.
My husband and I have 3 kids but our 3rd child took 2 years to conceive, it was the most painful 2 years of my life, and believe me I know those feelings of avoiding babies and pregnant people, feeling that anger and hurt and emotion that they have what you so desperately wanted.
Allow yourself to grieve for the little life lost, I don't give a toss what people say a miscarriage is still a death, that child has a soul and a soul passing on is sad. I still mark the day 4 years on now, and I'm not ashamed of it anymore because it shouldn't be suffered so quietly.
How you are feeling is 100% normal but don't let it rule you completely, whether you've had kids or not yet doesn't make a difference, it still hurts, seek that help nearby it might be exactly what you need to give you the boost to keep going. I've been a teen mum, I'm only 25 and I've been pregnant 4 times between the ages of 18 - 23, I know that you don't always get the support (sorry don't know how old you are just guessing from mum's reaction).
Even if an outsider is your only hope, get yourself the help you deserve, speak to other women who know how you feel from experience, go on a parenting forum and find the loss section and talk to them.
It does get easier, trust me on that but for now hang on tight and do what you need most to cope.
♥It's the ups and downs of living life this way. Promise me you'll never go away. Just stay with me through one more night because it's always darkest before the light and now I promise you I'll never turn away. I won't let you give us one less heart to break...♥
I don't even know, I woke up this morning feeling like absolute ****, within half an hour of waking up I'd already cried. it feels like somethings been torn out & I don't know why, or how to stop it.
