what' going on?

helpwanted · 01-05-2014, 09:05 AM

so I have not SH in just over a month but atm I'm getting really bad urges and it's not just that, I don't know what I feel and I'm constantly crying and I'm just so emotional and I just don't know why!
Every day I feel I'm sinking further and further into nothing and the things that are going on in my head are confusing and not pretty.
I'm getting even more scared of myself and people around me. I find it hard to be in groups because I freak out and have to try and stop myself from breaking down!

anyone have any advice?

iamatortoise · 02-05-2014, 06:54 PM

Hi,

Well done for going a month without self harming, that's really good.

Could you write down the things that are confusing then work through them to make them less confusing. (Sorry if this makes no sense!)

Could you say to your friends that you are struggling and maybe meet them in smaller groups?

Do you have anyone that you can talk to about these things?

helpwanted · 03-05-2014, 12:48 PM

i go to a boarding school so it is hard to avoid people.
I see a counsellor who I don't tell much and a psychologist who I tell some stuff. it is just really hard to talk about and I can never do it

iamatortoise · 03-05-2014, 03:00 PM

I know some things are really hard to discuss. Could you write them down what you want to say and give it to them at the start of end of a session?

Is there anywhere at school that you can go to be on your own? Do you have a quiet room or anything?

helpwanted · 03-05-2014, 04:40 PM

I have tried writing things down but I never have the courage to hand them over and at school I have my own room but there are people around constantly because I'm near the common room. I'm also not really allowed to go for walks on my own because I did once and I didn't come back for hours so they don't trust me

iamatortoise · 14-05-2014, 12:30 AM

Hey,

How are things now? If you want to go for walks to be alone could you take a phone with you and give them a times you'll be back and stick it?

helpwanted · 14-05-2014, 10:34 AM

to be honest I'm ready to give up, I gave into the urges and I just can't deal with anything any more. My doctor thinks he will hook me up with a psychiatrist because they think I need medication but tbh I really couldn't give a damn. Why give someone who try's over dosing drugs?