i'm living a lie, no one knows the real me, i don't want anyone to ever see it, if you saw the real me, you wouldn't believe it. , you wouldn't think it, i hide behind a mask so no one sees, but its hard to wear it all the time
I wish I could tell you all the truth, then start my life all over again. Or maybe I should just run away, start again that way? I don't know what you want. The truth will hurt, but if I don't tell you and you find out it'll hurt even more. I just don't know what to say to you.
I really don't feel very well.
But at least, after 72 hours of awake-ness, followed by 23 hours of sleep, I feel a little better. My chest doesn't hurt any more.
I'm not going to take the pills any more. They're just making things worse. I just want to let nature take it's course. What will happen, will happen.
It doesn't matter where you come from; it matters where you go.
No-one gets remembered for the things they didn't do.
We won't all be here this time next year,
so while you can take a picture of us.
We're definitely going to hell,
but we'll have all the best stories to tell.
That makes four of my friends then who most likely hate me for being so demanding. And only with one of them I think I could actually believe them when they say they don't.
It could be my NPD playing up, but if this does happen to be about me, I don't hate you.
Truefact.
Just for the record, I was actually diagnosed with Borderline Personilty Disorder at the start of this year, it is in my medical records, I read the letter from the psych to my GP over her shoulder on thus. I'm not making it up, I don't know if it is paronoia rhat is speaking, but i suspect some people don't actually believe me about this.
I want to live in a bubble, with endless books, DVDs and the inability to communicate with anyone. If I really have to be alive then those are my conditions. Oh and the inability to think and feel would be great. Kthanks.
The only time you will find real light is when you're searching in the dark..
I feel extremely guilty about what is happening with my brother right now. I know I shouldn't, I didn't know I was just scared. I made the call and now your like this. I don't know what to do I want you to come back, everyone wants you to come back home. I fucking hate the way the law system is. This is bullshit. I feel like a fucked up person I always told my mom to kick you out and to call the police; to put you in a mental rehab. I just didn't know how to deal with you this is difficult. And now your going through this...because I made a call.
She poisoned me this morning, Im certain of it. I didn't see where the pills came from and I've been so ill since. She keeps trying to make me drink. Constantly briging me food that only God knows what she's put in it. Im not safe here anymore.
♪♫ I'm Learning To Be Brave In My Beautiful Mistakes ♫♪
Please don't discharge me. Just because I have nothing intelligent to say doesn't mean I'm not trying. I'm trying so fridging hard but I really just have nothing intelligent to say.
I love you so much, you're such a beautiful person, I'm so proud to have to as my brother. I love how you don't care what other people think, you wear what you like, speak how you want, it's lovely. Especially after I've seen you for so many years trying 'to fit in'. Now you are you, and you're wonderful. You look so much like Dad, it's like he feels closer because you're so much like him.
He would be so proud of you, anyone would be proud of you. I love you.
