I started a new college course yesterday and I had to take an initial exam in the office, and as I was sat in there doing the exam I could hear the whole class (Including the teachers) having a laugh about self harm and jokingly telling this girl to go slit her wrists.
You're mad, bonkers, off your head.
But let me tell you something; All the best people are-Alice in wonderland.
All hail the almighty google!
Minnie_Mouse and Saxophone are my fellow wise searchers <3
I had a check up with the doctor today and he never knows how to ask how im coping so today he went with the line 'how's the cutting on your flesh going' I thought it was very akward lol Then the nurse had to come and steri strip me cause i had a bit of a problem last night and she said 'these are going to scar pretty badly but i can't inagine you really care' I was like wtf?!?
I will love myself despite the ease with which I lean toward the opposite.
^^^^^ Hugs
My professionals are the same. The Dr one made me lol just a little. Mine normally asks the first bit, but the 'flesh' bit... kind of odd.
I had a Dr say that they were going to scar pretty badly and at the time I didn't care- so I guess the nurse might have either- thought you had enough on your plate and didnt want to make you feel bad about the scars or you already have scars, which is the same as me now. One more wont really change the fact my arm is a mess.
Here's the day you hoped would never come,
Don't feed me violins, just run with me
through rows of speeding cars.
21 on the run, on the run, on the run
From myself, from myself and everyone
I better leave the light on
The darkness, The sweetness, The sadness, The weakness,
O, I need this
Hi, I'm Roli Take Care, Stay Safe, Shout if you need anything
After I plucked up the courage to go to A&E today (actually i was more like dragged there!) and after everything had been sorted out, I heard a doctor say to the nurse "she [me] doesn't deserve our help, if she wants to kill herself, let her and tell her not to waste our time". Erm rude.
Firstly I wasn't trying to kill myself, secondly thanks for the permission.
Have you ever looked fear in the face and said "I just don't care"?
This wasn't said to me, but a friend who SH told me she got this once she came out to another friend who whenever she looked upset she would always be like 'oh no, are you upset, are you gonna go cut yourself now' I think it was partly out of concern, not mockingly but she asked her this non stop. That would drive me MAD if someone did that to me.
♥ .I'm going to fall like I don't need saving. ♥
...My smile's just the armour I built when I was alone...
There was some part of me that hurt so badly, that I wouldn't ever be able to forget it.
It faded but the memories could bring it back any second, keeping me in the moment.
It would never fully heal. I could never really be free. I could never really be fixed. Now I just have to work out how to live whilst being broken.
I feel like I'm dying.
I have had a doctor at A&E laugh when I went in for self harm, he said "self...harm? whyy?" and then laughed.
He then said "follow me", and it was up to the nurses to tell him that I was ok to be treated in the cubicle.
All I could hear was things like "crazy girl, danger to the public", "im not treating her".
he also laughed when I wanted anaesthetic for stitches.
My mother: "Everything that you have put me through, therapy, hospitals, EVERYTHING should be considered criminal and I'll put you in front of a judge if I've found that you are cutting."
I know this isnt self harm, but it really upset me.
"do you know how selfish you are being? eating all that food and throwing it back up when there are children in Africa starving??"
Thanks, like i don't feel guilty enough already.
My mother : "You got what you deserved" when I told her the nurses( 2 women, 1 man) had made me strip of my clothes and I was left in my underwear's. When you know me, you know that it's something I can't handle.
-- English is not my mother-tongue, so I apologize for any spelling/grammar mistake --
My mother: "Everything that you have put me through, therapy, hospitals, EVERYTHING should be considered criminal and I'll put you in front of a judge if I've found that you are cutting.
This one reminded me of another my Mom told me right after I got out of Residential care.
"All the things I've done for you in the last year. You OWE me and your family. Its not all about you anymore. Its about US." (Referring to the family)
Various people: "I can't just stand there and watch you ruin your life. You're much too smart for that. What you're doing is so insulting to your intelligence." or something along those lines.
It really isn't a matter of intelligence, it's how I'm feeling. Do you really think saying that will make me stop cutting so I can redeem my 'intelligence'?
That doesn't make me any smarter or dumber, let alone makes me feel any better.
When I first told my doctor that I self harmed first thing she asked was "Is it because you think you're fat?"
I said not really, and she pretty much told me to excercise more and to keep a food diary. It really sucked that she was more concerned about me being fat than me hurting myself.
"Some people get by, with a little understanding. Some people get by, with a whole lot more."
Someone I used to go out with:
"If I see that you've done that again I'll rub salt in the cuts"
(or something similar - it was a long time ago, and he didn't thankfully)
@Buttons/Katy - I hope you've written on here those strange remarks from the cash desk woman at college..... :/
x
Some Things There Are No Words For, Only Shoulders To Lean On. Hands To Hold On To. And Hugs To Comfort You, As Best They Can.
Buttons - you make me proud.
MeaCulpa - It will never be your fault.
Everyone - Whatever you need to hear.
Take Care, Stay Safe, Shout if you need anything
