I don't think you realise how every time you mention it, it's like a battering to my already fragile self esteem. I'm finally happy. I'm in a place where I know who I am, I know what I want, I have friends and I am loved by people who I love.
You're not a bad mother. You never could be. I love you. But this has to stop. Why can't you see the signs? I'm breaking. I was fixed, I had picked up the pieces and I don't want to break again.
hello darkness, my old friend
I've come to talk with you again
because a vision softly creeping
left its seeds while I was sleeping
and the vision that was planted in my brain
still remains within the sound of silence
Good. Be happy. I was right, you would be without me bringing you down. Now you can do what you want without worrying about my reaction to it.
However, I don't see how friendship is viable at this point in time. The scars are still too fresh for me. But as I posted in the lyrics topic, I'm getting through it, one day at a time. Hell, at this point I don't even know if New Years is enough time. Maybe longer, I don't know, time will tell. By the time I'll be ready to speak again, you'll have long forgotten about me. And in actuality, it's better that way.
When I'm gone, are you gonna miss me? Are you even listening? Do you even care about anything at all?
*sighs* You really do think I'm happy right now, don't you.
"God take me, because I hate me" -Underoath
We are male and female. We are artists, athletes, and students. We have depression, PTSD, eating disorders, bipolar disorder, or maybe no diagnosis at all. Some of us were abused, some not. We come from all walks of life and can be any age. We are every race or religion that you can think of. Our common link is this: We are in pain. We self-injure. And we are not freaks.
I may not have an alcohol problem but I am defineatly realising that I have a problem with alcohol. I can't keep using it to try and stifle the bad feelings, because really it just makes it worse. I'm sorry that when we drink I can't just have a good time, I always end up cutting. I'm sorry, really.
"Some people get by, with a little understanding. Some people get by, with a whole lot more."
you need to talk to me. You are the reason I am trying to get clean, and you don't even know it. I feel initimdated by you and I think you don't like me, but I will get you.
and
**** OFF YOU **** WHO DO YOU THINK YOU ARE. YOU ARE SO HYPERCRITIAL AND YOU DON'T EVEN RALIZE I SELF HARM. YOU *****. IGNORANT *****.
"Monsters are real, ghosts are too. They live inside us and sometimes they win."
Then wear the gold hat, if that will move her;
If you can bounce high, bounce for her too,
Till she cry "Lover, gold-hatted, high-bouncing lover,
I must have you!"
Thomas Parke D’Invilliers
Dear Emma, you are a pathetic attention seeking slut! I hate that I have to live in this body with you. I hate that I have to listen to every self pitying thought and I wish you'd just die!
Let us go then you and I, when the evening is spread out against the sky, like a patient etherized upon a table
- T.S. Elliot
I just want to crawl into a hole and sit, not eat, wash or do fuck all. Avctually Il smoke and have coffee. Otherwises, fuck it. I havent read in days. Thats not like me. I want to just fade away. :'(
"If only everyone could know and live with their inner craziness…people would be fairer and happier." Paulo Coelho
Noone can see your tears when you walk in the rain
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: The most boring place on earth?
I am currently:
Last time inchecked I was out.
You don't have to hide behind a freaking binder when you walk past me. I'm not gonna talk to you. I'm not gonna turn you to stone if you're not protected from me.
The beer spills in a disgusting puddle and the glass becomes nothing but fragments of a rainbow.
That was my friends protecting me. I wasn't looking. I wasn't going to. They didn't want me to. I didn't plan on it.
You are out, I just can't get you off my mind. And I still can't figure out why.
When I'm gone, are you gonna miss me? Are you even listening? Do you even care about anything at all?
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