Either I'm a hyperchondriac...

[Detour. Derail]

or I really AM ill but Im too afraid to go to the doctors....

or a mixture of the two....

All starting with me asking my old GP for help because I was having trouble with my sleep (ie sleeping for too long or at the wrong time of the day, literally sitting down for 5 minutes and passing out for 5 hours), I felt light headed and dizzy and weak all the time, so I went and asked for help because I was trying to get my A-levels and work and it was affecting my entire life.....and I got told to go away and deal with it because "I was being paranoid". After much investigation of my own I found out it was a combination of anemia and side effects from my anti-depressants.

Since then Im not on the AD's anymore (although at times I really think I should be) and I'm working hard to balance my diet out well.....but little things such as a pain here or a dizzy spell there have me panicking at the thought of potentially having to go see ANY doctor.

To date I have had no physio on my knees (which I damaged in a car accident) and these give me pain, I have recentlly hurt my elbow at work (Repetitive Strain Injury) and my sleeping pattern is ruining my life (as it has been doing for the past 4 years). Recentlly Ive been getting dizzy spells and I feel exhausted all the time. Im afraid of getting ill and last summer I suffered with severe stomach cramps for just over a month before i was forced to go see a doctor by my friend.

I dont know what Im asking for.....I just needed to get all this off my chest because other people (jokingly or not) just call me a hyperchondriac....all I know is I'm struggling....but Im that afraid to go see a doctor that I make excuses as to why I CANT go as opposed to why I wont go....

[cakey]

i have no advice, but wanted to let you know someone read and understood. i hate going to the drs, and avoid going as much as i can!

[Detour. Derail]

thank you1 nice to know im not alone! everyone else shouts at me and tells me to get a grip....but its scary...especially when they look at your record and go "I see you had depression...." and im sat there going yes but whats that got to do with [insert ailment here]

[Stage Star]

Hey! I'm so glad I saw this thread because I've actually been diagnosed with Hypochondriasis Anxiety (health anxiety) so I know exactly what you're going through.

Hypochondria is actually a medical term (although people use it jokingly) and it's basically an irrational fear of illness. It takes different forms in different people. For example, I was convinced I was dying of cancer and constantly checked my body for lumps, and ate tons to make sure I didn't lose weight (I knew that sudden weight loss was a sign of cancer). I could tell you the symptoms for any number of diseases and was afraid of them all. Like you and your sleep problems, I had a health scare which triggered all these feelings, but unlike you, I wasn't scared to go to the doctors. Well, I was scared of what they'd tell me when I got there, but going and getting an answer was easier than sitting and driving myself mad with anxiety. But avoiding doctors altogether is also normal.

Your exhaustion and dizzy spells are more than likely something to do with anxiety. I don't want to come across as diagnosing you though, so maybe have a read of this link : http://www.bbc.co.uk/dna/h2g2/A3022101 and if you can relate, maybe start thinking about talking to someone about it. Ignore the bit about having to have symptoms for 6 months before doing anything about it, because I had symptoms for less than 2 months. I know it will be hard for you to go to a doctor but if you do have some sort of health anxiety problem, doctors are the best people to help make you feel better.

Good luck.

[Detour. Derail]

thank you for the link! I'll give it a read....I mean I havent fallen asleep yet so I might as well do something productive.

And its not so much that I worry about one particular illness....I worry about EVERYTHING! I cant google anything or watch documentaries without going "OMG! SOMETIMES I DO THAT!!" I watched something about a really rare sleep disorder and convinced myself that I had it....and whilst in the kitchen defrosting the freezer the other day I convinced myself I had breathed in a poisionous gas from the freezer and was going to get a brain tumour....to which my housemates laughed...
ive had to block things like boots webmedic off my laptop because i was on it everyday :(
i feel like im going crazy :(

[Stage Star]

I relate to that completely! I couldn't watch medical documentaries (it's been 18 months and I still have to be careful), and I was googling illnesses so much I had to limit myself to how often I was on the computer. I had my mirrors taken out of my room to stop me from checking lumps/marks/spots and my mum hid the scales so I didn't excessively check my weight. I know what you mean about being afraid of EVERYTHING. When anyone in my family gets ill (even if it's obviously not contagious, like food poisoning) I isolate myself in my room and hold my breath whenever I have to leave!

You're not going crazy even though I know you feel like it. If you can possibly do it, and I know it's hard, try to start diagnosing yourself with anxiety more than anything else. It will help make you feel less crazy. You've already done a good thing by blocking the medical pages, but really try to avoid everything you possibly can that might worry you. If a medically-related advert comes on the tv, block your ears. Skip the health pages in the newspapers. If someone's watching a medical documentary, leave the room. It's just a case of isolating yourself from as many 'triggers' as possible.

It's completely your decision obviously, but a good doctor can help you. I got put on anti-depressants first, and then when it became obvious that I needed more help, I got put into some CBT therapy. I don't know if you're already on medication already, but it might be worth looking into what a doctor can do for you.

[Detour. Derail]

I was on them but then I moved to a new city for uni so my old doctor weaned me off my anti depressants and a new doctor put me back on them before taking me off them again a few months later....and then I just got all nervy and anxious about getting ill and every bruise became cause for concern. I have a friend who is doing a nursing degree and I started to drive her mad with questions so I have to show real self control not to text her EVERY time I get a concern....I might go speak to a doctor....but its so hard....I find it really daunting but theres no one in this city I can take for support :(

[Stage Star]

Obviously I can't speak for every doctor in the country, but a good one should understand that it's daunting for you. And getting it off your chest to someone impartial and someone who should be able to help you might be a massive relief. And then once you've got a professional's opinion you could tell your nurse friend about your worries and then she'll understand why you're constantly seeking reassurance. Or if you can't go to a doctor, maybe tell your friend instead? Again, just acknowledging your anxieties to a "real-life" person (hehe) might be a huge help. x