Some of you may have read about what happened with me and my two closest friends. Suffice to say that when they ended up together as lesbians it broke my heart and caused me more pain than I could handle, leading to me attempting suicide. It still hurts every day, but its surviveable.
At first, they put it all over facebook about their relationship, but they learnt that everytime I saw something like that on facebook it caused me incredible amounts of pain, and toned it down. However, one of our friends keeps putting stuff about it on facebook that causes me alot of pain. Before she put how she wanted to get the first pics of them making out, and today... they all had a big discussion on the facebook wall organising getting pics of them making out. I am in so much pain right now, I am shaking and my chest hurts so much and I just want to curl up and die. I know it is selfish of me......
I have logged of facebook for today and I don't know if I can ever face going back on facebook with stuff like that flying around...but facebook is my main means of keeping in touch with my friends.....
What the hell am I supposed to do?
Life is one short moment of pure happyness in a sea of endless and agonising pain.
Quote:
If you got a cat for one day, man I mean, if you, say, say, if you want a cat for 365 days, right you aint got him for 365 days, you got him for one day, man you know, you can say, oh man, you can cry about the other 364, man, but you're gonna lose that one day, man, and that's all youve got
-Janis Joplin, Ball & Chain Unseated from braniac champion by Mistress of Misery :)
Also, when you're feeling more calm again and able to go back on facebook, could you delete them as friends on there, so that you don't have to read this stuff? That way you can still use facebook to keep in contact with other friends.
They are my closest friends..
Well I have just deactivated my facebook account. If they care about me they can use ryl or phones to keep in touch (both my closest friends have accounts on ryl)
I though that people were more sensitive to my situation that this. Obviously I was wrong.
Life is one short moment of pure happyness in a sea of endless and agonising pain.
Quote:
If you got a cat for one day, man I mean, if you, say, say, if you want a cat for 365 days, right you aint got him for 365 days, you got him for one day, man you know, you can say, oh man, you can cry about the other 364, man, but you're gonna lose that one day, man, and that's all youve got
-Janis Joplin, Ball & Chain Unseated from braniac champion by Mistress of Misery :)
I wish I hadn't promised to my friend that I would stay alive.... it hurts way too much... I cant handle this, its too much pain.... I wish she would release me from that promise...
Life is one short moment of pure happyness in a sea of endless and agonising pain.
Quote:
If you got a cat for one day, man I mean, if you, say, say, if you want a cat for 365 days, right you aint got him for 365 days, you got him for one day, man you know, you can say, oh man, you can cry about the other 364, man, but you're gonna lose that one day, man, and that's all youve got
-Janis Joplin, Ball & Chain Unseated from braniac champion by Mistress of Misery :)
I missed your original situation so I apologise for this, but what is it exactly that is hurting you right now to the point of suicide? Suicide is a permanent solution to our pain, and the pain is often temporary. Relationships ending are rarely a good reason to throw your whole life away. The pain will ease.
And as for facebook, good idea staying off it. I had a discussion with my psychologist about facebook once and she agreed with me that when you're feeling depressed, or isolated, or alone, facebook can be one of the WORST things for you cause it takes other peoples friendships and shove them in your face. Unless you're resilient enough to connect with others and ignore it, then a facebook break might be wise.
Its complicated...if you must know the details I already have a recent thread in this section about it all....
It just hurts too much! It hurts constantly and has been doing so for weeks now. Ive been lonely all my life and the one person who made me happy led me on, built up my self esteem, told me she loved me and then she broke my heart and hurt me. Its just too much pain for me to handle I can't do this anymore.
Life is one short moment of pure happyness in a sea of endless and agonising pain.
Quote:
If you got a cat for one day, man I mean, if you, say, say, if you want a cat for 365 days, right you aint got him for 365 days, you got him for one day, man you know, you can say, oh man, you can cry about the other 364, man, but you're gonna lose that one day, man, and that's all youve got
-Janis Joplin, Ball & Chain Unseated from braniac champion by Mistress of Misery :)
Sanai.. I am not sure if I am suposed to be reading this, and please, if you would prefer to me stay of this website, I can find my own website similar to RYL.
But, once again, i want to apologize for everything, I know you hate hearing it. But i dont know what else to say, as I know you can not handle my true feelings at the moment, I dont want you worrying. I love you, and.. I hope you know i am trying my hardest to stop hurting you on facebook. I have told people not to write anything about me and mars on my profile, and if they do I have been deleting them. I am sorry.. for everything, I am jsut sorry.
Our lives are a bit like a bad soap opera sometimes....
No chloe, I do not want you to leave this website.
Life is one short moment of pure happyness in a sea of endless and agonising pain.
Quote:
If you got a cat for one day, man I mean, if you, say, say, if you want a cat for 365 days, right you aint got him for 365 days, you got him for one day, man you know, you can say, oh man, you can cry about the other 364, man, but you're gonna lose that one day, man, and that's all youve got
-Janis Joplin, Ball & Chain Unseated from braniac champion by Mistress of Misery :)
Why don't you just try *hiding* them? So don't have to read the posts unless you really think you're up for it or not at all. Its up to you. That way you can still keep in touch with people but you don't have to see what it is that is putting you in so much pain.
*huuuge hugg*!
Other than that, I can only reiterate what other people have said; keep off Facebook until you can face it.
The reason it hurts is because I have feelings for one of them. Yes, it makes them happy to be with each other, but it hurts me alot, especially seeing as how I was led on a bit at first when she was a bit confused about whether she had feelings for me or not.
But it is okay. I have made a new facebook account and only added the people I want to talk to on facebook. It is a nice fresh start. I am handling facebook a bit better now that I have done this and now that she is being more careful.
Life is one short moment of pure happyness in a sea of endless and agonising pain.
Quote:
If you got a cat for one day, man I mean, if you, say, say, if you want a cat for 365 days, right you aint got him for 365 days, you got him for one day, man you know, you can say, oh man, you can cry about the other 364, man, but you're gonna lose that one day, man, and that's all youve got
-Janis Joplin, Ball & Chain Unseated from braniac champion by Mistress of Misery :)
I think you are overreacting and being selfish. You can't really expect them not to have anything about their relationship on facebook, they are happy and in love and they are, of course, allowed to show that on facebook as well. If you have a problem with it, it's up to you to avoid it. Not asking them not to discuss their relationship there.
I think they have already done too much, by deleting messages that may upset you. In the end, keeping you safe is your responsibility, not theirs. That means, if anything upsets you to the point where you want to kill yourself, YOU do what you have to do, to avoid those triggers.
I think you are completely out of order, to expect them not to have things about their relationship on facebook, simply because it upsets you. You are, after all, not the centre of the universe and if it makes them happy to show their love on facebook, they should't avoid that, simply because it upsets one person.
And you are a teenager, you will probably experience heartache plenty of more times in your life, learning to live with it and move on is possibly more helpful for you, than ending your own life because of this one incident.
Last edited by Morpheus : 22-12-2010 at 06:49 PM.
Den fuldkomne kærlighed,
Kan ikke eksistere blandt ufuldkomne
I think you are overreacting and being selfish. You can't really expect them not to have anything about their relationship on facebook, they are happy and in love and they are, of course, allowed to show that on facebook as well. If you have a problem with it, it's up to you to avoid it. Not asking them not to discuss their relationship there.
I think they have already done too much, by deleting messages that may upset you. In the end, keeping you safe is your responsibility, not theirs. That means, if anything upsets you to the point where you want to kill yourself, YOU do what you have to do, to avoid those triggers.
I think you are completely out of order, to expect them not to have things about their relationship on facebook, simply because it upsets you. You are, after all, not the centre of the universe and if it makes them happy to show their love on facebook, they should't avoid that, simply because it upsets one person.
And you are a teenager, you will probably experience heartache plenty of more times in your life, learning to live with it and move on is possibly more helpful for you, than ending your own life because of this one incident.
I think you are overreacting and being selfish. You can't really expect them not to have anything about their relationship on facebook, they are happy and in love and they are, of course, allowed to show that on facebook as well. If you have a problem with it, it's up to you to avoid it. Not asking them not to discuss their relationship there.
I think they have already done too much, by deleting messages that may upset you. In the end, keeping you safe is your responsibility, not theirs. That means, if anything upsets you to the point where you want to kill yourself, YOU do what you have to do, to avoid those triggers.
I think you are completely out of order, to expect them not to have things about their relationship on facebook, simply because it upsets you. You are, after all, not the centre of the universe and if it makes them happy to show their love on facebook, they should't avoid that, simply because it upsets one person.
And you are a teenager, you will probably experience heartache plenty of more times in your life, learning to live with it and move on is possibly more helpful for you, than ending your own life because of this one incident.
This is very true, especially the part I've highlighted.
I know all this teenager "you will go through this many times, you have a life ahead of you, bla bla bla" stuff. I have heard it many times and I had figured that out myself, having a brain and all.
Look, I am not overreacting. I simply do not have a choice in how I feel or how it all makes me feel. You think I would choose to be in this much pain? My friends are understanding and are doing what they can to try and keep me safe. Hey, one of them even offered not to pursue the relationship to avoid hurting me, and I had to convince her to go ahead with the relationship because I want them to be happy.
Life is one short moment of pure happyness in a sea of endless and agonising pain.
Quote:
If you got a cat for one day, man I mean, if you, say, say, if you want a cat for 365 days, right you aint got him for 365 days, you got him for one day, man you know, you can say, oh man, you can cry about the other 364, man, but you're gonna lose that one day, man, and that's all youve got
-Janis Joplin, Ball & Chain Unseated from braniac champion by Mistress of Misery :)
