Wtf? They were my fucking friends you bitch. Do whatever the fuck you want, I don't care. I'm gunna quit soon anyway, which is shit, cause it on of the few things i really enjoy in my life. I hope your proud of yourself.
It hurts to swallow. . .The ED is threatening to take over again. . .I want to cut. . .I dont know what to do. . .I dont even know why all of this is happening. . .I dont know why I'm spiriling again. . .I.Dont.Know. I want the pain. . .But I have no reason to want it. . .Everything has been going so well for me. . .Am I really just that fucked up??? I must be. . .I really must be. . .
But as long as I remember to smile for those around, it'll all get better, right?? God, I want to cry right now. . .I dont know why I want all of this again. . .WHY?!?!?!? TELL ME PLEASE!!!! PLEASE TELL ME WHY I WANT THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
"I let my guard down, and you caught me by surprise" Sonic Syndicate
add me if you want. just let me know you're from RYL.
I know you've heard that a lot from me recently, and maybe you've stopped believing i mean it, but i do.
I wish i wasn't like i am. I have problems. Big problems that are right now verging on ruining my life. I love you more than anything, but i feel bad. I know you know the depression and the BPD are a lifelong thing, but as much as i rips me apart to say it, if you feel like you can't deal with it, then walk away. I'll understand its what you have to do.
Part of me feels i shouldn't even be allowed to be in a relationship, i feel all i do is screw other people up and make them miserable. I want to make you happy, but i keep making you unhappy. I don't mean to.
I'm sorry if i don't think things through. I think i've always been like that. But i am trying my hardest to change.
That's why i haven't texted you. You need some time to yourself, and i need to show you that it can happen without me getting upset/psychotic. I promise i won't mention "her". Who you speak to is your business. I'm sorry if my jealously has pushed you away recently, i think it is partly the BPD because i am so so scared of losing you. You're my world and if i lose you then what do i have left? Nothing. You make me happy. You look after me. You make me smile. You give me hope.
I should be able to say this you, and maybe i will write it down for you.
I love you.
Life Is Like A Beautiful Melody Only The Lyrics Are Messed Up
im so so so proud of you! TOP 10 IN THE COUNTRY IN TWO of your subjects! its just amazing! you are such a little brilliant genius! i couldnt be happier if i tried and its all because of you doing so well and being such an amazing friend! i love you sooooo much!
xxxxx
Confusion girl
Never gets a break Tries to cover up all of her mistakes Wants to be someone else Anyone but herself.
Sarah: Give me the child.
Jareth: Sarah beware. I have been generous up till now. I can be cruel.
Sarah: Generous? What have you done that's generous?
Jareth: Everything! Everything you have wanted I have done. You asked the child be taken, I took him. You cowered before me, I was frightening. I have reordered time. I have turned the world upside down, and I have done it all for you! I am exhausted from living up to your expectations of me. Isn't that generous?
I know that you were tired and you didn't mean it. But I was looking for support and you failed to give it to me. And I'm angry about it. I hate how insensitive you can be. I love you, but you're kind of a bitch.
Please don't be serious Paul.
I love you truly.
I don't mean to.
i love you sooooo much!
