A classic put-down

Harley's Dad · 22-01-2014, 06:30 PM

Lifted unashamedly from Melanie Reid's column in the Times Magazine last Saturday in which she was discussing the advantages/disadvantages of being a tall woman (which she was before a serious fall from her horse which left her a tetraplegic):

"I trust these girls still rework the best tall woman put-down of all time, to be deployed when a vertically challenged chap is brave enough to suggest he would, well, enjoy a sh*g with you:"Well, if you do, and I find out, I will be very cross."

Tony (definitely not disclosing my height!).

Harley's Dad · 23-01-2014, 12:24 AM

Oh dear, doesn't anyone here find it funny. I did, Melanie Reid did and presumably the editor of the Times Magazine did in order to publish it ...

Tony - (clearly in a world of his own)

offlineforever · 23-01-2014, 12:51 AM

I personally don't quite understand it.

That could however be due to the fact I have spent the past three days trying to get my head around lots of literary theories that I have forgotten in the past six months.

FabulousMike · 23-01-2014, 01:10 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheLonliestGirl

I personally don't quite understand it.

Same here but I am just slow.

Scumbelina · 23-01-2014, 01:33 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TheLonliestGirl

I personally don't quite understand it.

Same.

Is she saying she wouldn't notice if said vertically challenged chap 'sh*gged* her? :-/

Harley's Dad · 23-01-2014, 12:10 PM

Yes Scumbelina, that's exactly what she's saying - the implication being that he's hopelessly small in all respects ...

Tony (my post wasn't intended as some sort of test)

offlineforever · 23-01-2014, 08:17 PM

I think it would have made sense if I'd seen the whol artivle. But thanks for taking the time to explain it to us Tony.

BridgesAndBalloons · 23-01-2014, 08:37 PM

Haha I got it, awesome

Steel Maiden · 27-01-2014, 10:45 PM

I still don't get it. Hopelessly small in what respects?

Harley's Dad · 28-01-2014, 01:04 AM

His genitals, Steel ... and of course it's much less funny when spelled out in detail like that. But a hell of a good put-down in the first instance.

Tony.

Harley's Dad · 28-01-2014, 04:44 PM

Oh dear, Epic, what she is saying is "you funny little man, you're so small that I wouldn't even notice if you tried to sh*g me". The more we analyse it here the less funny it now seems - sorry for posting.

But if I were a small man and I had evil intentions regarding a tall woman, I would hope to be subtle enough to be spared this sort of put-down - or to pre-empt her remarks with something like "Gosh, I don't actually have to go down on you". Enough!

Tony.

Steel Maiden · 28-01-2014, 07:43 PM

Why is having a small set of genitalia funny? Some people with endocrine disorders have small genitals.

Enthused · 29-01-2014, 03:39 PM

Jesus Christ. I thought I was unfunny...