Triggering (SI) - Self harm becoming progessively worse?

I can go a while without self harm - i have BPD and often feel like i go through rather "impulsive" intense periods where i self harm every day/every other day.

Due to going through a pretty hard patch right now, i'm finding the more i self harm, the more unsatisfied i am, so i end up going deeper.

I usually just do surface wounds - nothing necessarily major, just lots in one patch.
This time round i'm starting to get to the steri-strip stage and my wounds are bleeding for a much longer period of time.

Is this the case with self harm?! Is this what i've gotten myself into? Surface wounds just aren't satisfying me anymore.

I have no idea what the point of this thread is. Just. Gah. My arms are a mess.

[BeautifulMess]

I can understand what you're going through: when I first started all I would do would be to bend back my fingers. It then progressed to using a fingernail to piece my skin and then onto knives. This is why self harm is so dangerous, however small and insignificant it is to start with, it becomes a much greater problem. Some people say that Self Harm is like an addiction in this way, in that you constantly want more and more. I would certainly suggest getting medical help if things carry on as they are. You may feel that you can cope but it's wroth getting a professional opinion: perhaps a GP or nurse? Are you having counseling or some form of help for your self harm? If not, I would definitely recommend it before things get even worse. Often you may think that you're in control of your behavior but if you find yourself going deeper and deeper you're going to permanently and seriously damage yourself. Don't be afraid to ask for help: you CAN get out of this, it doesn't have to get worse.

Best of luck, feel free to pm anytime,


Take care,


Naomi


xx

[Miss Punk]

I found out the same thing, I started out with little scratches which turned into massive bleeding cuts and I have the feeling it's yet to get worse before it gets better. And I always thought I was in control, until it got worse and worse. I'm trying to get help at the moment. Maybe it would be good for you to look for help as well, I know sure as anything I need it. Take care xx

[tigris]

I think I am in the middle of a getting worse period and its kind of scary. I am no longer satisfied with surface wounds either, and a few years ago I only SIed once every few months, now its every few days. It is scary but at least you have acknowledged there is a problem, and can therefore maybe go about getting help for it? I can't talk as I haven't made that step yet, but its something I am thinking about and am building up to.

Take care xx

[Katiee]

I understand what you mean, sweetie. I went through that stage as well. Is there anyone you can talk to or maybe get some supprot from? Like a therapist/family member/doctor, ect? xo.