I want to start out by saying that I normally don't turn to things like this for help, because usually there's a bunch of a-holes that would probably say non helpful things. But I figured I'd give it a shot. Okay. I've been diagnosed with severe clinical depression, anxiety, and ADD. All of this interferes with my everyday life. I feel though that I'm more so depressed because of the fact that I'm an atheist and I see this whole life as pointless. Basically I found myself on a website earlier that was for a suicide help line (the phone number and people's stories and all). And I was like, wow.. It lead to this?? And basically everyone just makes me feel worse as the days go by, ditching me this day, saying hardly anything to me that day, being generic towards me the next. It's more complicated than what I'm putting it as, but I'm trying not to make this an essay. And basically I have a fiancee, yes I'm engaged to a girl so if you're anti gay just exit out, thanks. And she makes me happy.. But I still have a void, and I'm scared to get close to her...Well, closER... to her.. Because once I die or she dies, it's over... No heaven or any of that bull-sh*t. And everything is just pointless. I don't know who I am, what I want, anything. It's all a terrible mess. Has anyone been in my shoes before? Atheist, depressed, just hate everything and everyone just dissapoints you??? Excuse my spelling, I really don't care.
Yeah I've been there before, and still have my moments. I'm not an Atheist, but I also have phases where I just think "everything ends in death...wow, what's the point?" so it's similar. If you think this life is all we have, then alright, it is all rather pointless, but ppl make their own purpose in life. You can either go through life thinking that nothing matters and noone matters, because it all ends. Or you can just accept that that's how it is, and try to make the most of what you have since you're living. Just try to do what makes you happy. Most ppl suck, so I dont blame you for ppl disappointing you, but that's life. You just gotta ignore that and try to focus on the things and ppl that make you happy. I assume your fiancee makes you happy, so that's a good aspect of your life at least. And I get what you're saying about death and being afraid to be closer to her, and...that kind of thing is scary and painful, but the only other option is to isolate yourself frm everyone and never care about anyone or anything, just so you can avoid feeling sad about ppl dying, or others feeling sad about you dying. It's a hard thing to deal with, but it's an inevitable part of life, and it's better to embrace this happiness and good times with ppl while you can. Can you tlk to her about it?
Hey there. I know how you feel. I, too, am an atheist. I also feel that life is pointless and it's interfeared with my relationships too. I feel that I hate everyone almost all the time. You're not alone. I know that it's hard to keep going or to even try, but hang in there. Is your fiancee supportive with your depression, ADD and anxiety? sorry if this wasn't helpful...
yeah, I've talked about it with her before. She's agnostic, but believes in forever in some way.. But yeah she has depression and anxiety and other stuff similar to that too. But I didn't tell her about it really getting to me, today. I just don't see the point, she can't change reality for me.. And no, both of you, you're answers are good because at least you both can relate on some level.. I just don't know what to do to stop this fear.. And to actually live life, and be happy.
I cant give you any specific advice on how to do that. For me it just kinda happened. I just...embraced the things in my life that gave me a sense of purpose, even if only on an individual level. Maybe in the grand scheme of things, nothing feels like it has any point, but we're all just ourselves, so we might as well make the best of it. She cant change reality for you, but being open with her about it might help, especially if she has some stuff she can relate to with you. Other than that, I have nothing I can suggest. It's just one of those things you gotta try and change your mentality towards. Not your beliefs, but how they affect you and make you feel.
