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There will come a time when you believe everything is finished. That will be the beginning
Louis L'Amour
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My Life.
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As a very young child, i never realized what was truly going on all around me. My dad kept cheating on my mother, sneaking out to be with and do "something" with another woman.
and when i was 12 my mother told me about it. and she also left my dad for another man.
leaving me in a dramatic situation at the time.
every day i started to feel more and more depressed....
recently, my mother started getting more interested in him than anything. and hes pretty much all she cares about.
and i have been feeling alone constantly.
so i started self harming.
i would wake up in the morning and think to my self "no one cares....who would care if i cut myself?"
so i did.
and nearly everyday after school i would come home and cut more and more...
but i soon ran out of skin...
so i couldn't cut where it would be hidden constantly.
but i didn't care. i moved to my arm.
it looked butchered but i didn't care
i kept this up for 3 months till the someone found out and told the counselor at school.
she called my mother and my mother checked me for cuts, burns, etc everyday for a month.
and as soon as she stopped checking me, i started cutting again.
by this time i had so many scars i didn't care if i made more.
......a few months later, i took a whole bottle of pills in attempt at suicide....
and obviously...it didn't work.
and then my dad got a girl friend. and now he'd rather be with her than with me. its so annoying and i feel even more alone than i ever did in the past.
sometimes i wished i was never born.
and after he started acting that way, i started making gashes and deep cuts on my leg, thigh, and stomach.
up until a few days ago.
i just up and quit. its only been 3 days....and im so tempted to go back to self injury....but who knows?
i don't. - 539 Views
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