| |
|
| |
|
| |
Success is never final. Failure is never fatal. It is courage that counts
Winston Churchill
|
|
|
|
| |
Some people cut to get rid of emotions, but is it possible to cut to bring about emotion? And if so, why would you do that?
 Print
You are certainly far from alone in feeling what you do.
This is a very complicated subject, and to keep things relatively simple I am sure there will be some areas of over-generalisation, and some aspects missed out - but I hope this helps clear things up a little for you and others in your situation.
Self-Harm, as explained in other articles like this - is simply a coping mechanism used to deal with problems, and that has been kept very generic for good reason. Self-Harm, which encompasses Eating Disorders, Self Injury, Drinking, Smoking and Drug Taking is 'the act of doing anything knowingly harmful to yourself for a reason'. The act of Self-Harming, and the precise reasons and affects of the behavior are near infinite in combination. Some do it in moderation, in combination with other 'coping mechanisms' - others rely heavily on one type or many to get through their lives, most anywhere and everywhere in-between.
Cutting, of course if Self-Injury - and the act of cutting releases 'Endorphins' - which are basically your bodies in built pain relief system. By causing damage to yourself, your body deals with it as it would any other wound - with shock and calming chemicals to relieve the state of trauma. By unhappy side effect - this state of 'pain relief' is also highly effective, in the short term of dulling internal pain - the pain relief works to ease inner turmoil. However it also works on different levels, and exactly how depends totally on the individual involved.
The first of these is 'transferal' - by creating something physical that is painful, you transfer inner pain to something real, you metamorphasize what is so hard to grasp into something that you can see, feel - and tend to...heal. For someone who is chronically bad at storing undealt-with issues, fears and problems to the back of their minds, this process allows them to, in some small way 'deal' with an issue.
The second brings us neatly to your situation - but bear in mind it is still very much related to the others parts also - most people are affected by most or all of the points in this article, to differing extents. When someone fails to deal with the input of stress and pain and problem that comes into their lives, they can often slip into a mode of survival that makes them very hard skinned. This is often triggered by sudden shock, over trauma or loss of some sort - the problem is far too large to deal with, so it is partially or completely 'pushed aside' - and a brave face is put on. This is the 'mask' that is so often talked about and felt among Self-Harmers. It is often fueled by other factors - such as self-worth etc, and is very common indeed in those who have 'grown into Self-Injury'. By that I mean those who have failed to develop the 'confidence in support' and mechanisms for 'healthy' coping at an early age (nearly always between 7-13).
Wearing this mask, especially for a long time - can create a mindset of short or extended periods of 'numbness'. You become accustomed, for want of a better word - to not feeling anything over large, painful things, so even when things are going well it is easy to slip into an emotional clearing.
Now - again as I have mentioned a lot elsewhere - Self-Injury (let's just focus in on that aspect of Self-Harm for simplicity's sake) is a failed 'coping mechanism'. While in the short term - it does effectively allow someone to 'escape', it completely fails to actually deal with a problem - only to mask it further. In fact all one ends up with the next morning are the exact same problems, but now with the added wounds and guilt that goes with it. There is no doubt that Self-Injury moves in the opposite direction to suicide, that it is a mechanism brought into use to make things better - but because it only deals with the feelings of overloaded-ness, and not the underlying causes for them - it is always sadly going to make things worse if relied on as the primary coping mechanism, as it will always become.
The same of course is true when you don't do it to escape overload, to relieve emotion - but also when you use Self Injury to create it. The numbness you wish to escape is caused by the cycle explained about, that has to be broken out of, and is ironically 'helped' by making everything more 'numb'
Another aspect to this is that the chemicals released into your bloodstream when you cut - are 'addictive', just like a less natural 'high' - and you are able to build tolerance to them (both reasons why SI becomes the dominant coping mechanism, why it tends to always get worse, and why it is hard to quit). When you are feeling numb - there is that good old tool in your toolbox that you will help you out. It is rather like having withdrawal symptoms.
One last point I have not yet touched on - is the aspect of 'making trouble'. This tends only ever to be an additional aspect to most peoples behavior if any - but worth a mention none to less. Often, when things have been pushed inside for a long time - the pressure of all that unresolved 'stuff' remains, even when it would seem like nothing is the matter. No direct problems exist in your life - yet you still felt undeserving of any happiness, and devoid of emotion. Often cutting allows a way of creating, or manifesting a problem that you can see, and feel - a reason to feel the way you do...proof things aren't all that great after all. This often acts within the subconscious, and can be a powerful force indeed - it also comes into play with Eating Disorders and some of the other 'types' of Self-Harm.
Whether you are cutting to avoid emotion, or to create it - it is not something to be ashamed of, and is both understandable, and expectable - considering the situation you have found yourself in. Your goal is to boost some of the criteria that hold back the readiness to stop - like self confidence, communication and ambition - and to, through whatever means learn the mechanisms required to deal with the issues left unresolved that fuel the urges,
I hope that has helped a little - and I wish you the best of luck,
Harley - 3243 Views
View and Make Comments (4) |
| |
...hi.
I am 11 years old and I
self-harm, I told my sister
but then she ended up trying
to commit suicide not to long
after. She also deals with
depression and has been for a
very long time. I have MANY
cuts and some have faded but I
can still..feel them?
OASans
I used to self harm like
cutting myself or burning, but
it's been a long time since I
did this last time. However, a
friend of mine seemed to
discover my scars and begin to
be afraid of me yesterday. I
really treasure him and I am
now very stressed out.
OASans
I used to self harm like
cutting myself or burning, but
it's been a long time since I
did this last time. However, a
friend of mine seemed to
discover my scars and begin to
be afraid of me yesterday. I
really treasure him and I am
not very stressed out.
Sorry, your account does not have access to submit information.
View Message History |
|
| |
| |
| |
Online Now: 1957
0 Members
1957 Guests
Most members ever online was 26513 on March 29, 2026 at 17:26 PM.
|
| |
Members: 92767
Posts: 4359208
Welcome our newest member, Minx66 |
|
|
|
You are most definitely not alone. I cut for both reasons. If my depression or anxiety are getting to me, I cut to make them go away for a while, even though I know they'll come back worse. But if I'm numb and can't feel anything then I cut to feel something.
this sounds weird but i do it to get rid of ther pain i hide from everybody and to bring a relice sometimse fergetting pain and making me fell a kind if like FAKE hope i feel hop but i myself know that it will only last and i will fell miserabole later once thay heel or the pain just fade it will all start again
that was one of the big reasons I cut was to just feel SOMETHING. so you're not the only one.
Yes.
Sometimes I feel overwhelmed by feelings I can't even describe, so I cut.
Other times, I feel nothing, like a zombie drifting down this endless void, so I cut and it remides me that I can still feel something. Even if that doesn't work, at least there's the Endorphine increase involved in cutting...