I have so many weird symptoms, but I had no idea what they belong to. Though I am going to a psychiatrist to go get diagnosed, I'd like to know what you guys think this might be.
Here are my symptoms:
- Hearing voices; They constantly reprimand me and tell me everything is my fault, that no one likes me, etc.
- Visual hallucinations (seeing demons and monsters)
- Confused, disorganized thinking. Sometimes I can't understand what I'm thinking.
- Racing thoughts
- Delusions. I didn't know I was delusional at the time they occurred, but did whenever the "episode" ended.
- I'm incredibly emotional. I can be happy one minute and completely hysterical the next. There are times when everything seems completely right, but something small like the wind blowing the wrong way can cause me to go into a fit of rage.
- Manic episodes. These last less than a few hours.
- Lots of panic attacks. 7-15 a day.
- Paranoia
- Apparently catatonic episodes. If something distresses me enough I just freeze in place and disassociate. Sometimes its not really staying in one place. I could pace back and forth for hours at a time, or until the stress resolves itself.
So what does this sound like? Am I going crazy or something?
Haha, that's fine. I also tend to post when I notice something has 0, cause I know what it feels like when you look back hours later and you're like "... still no replies? Man... =["
But any post is a good post at this point.
I just don't want to be hospitalized. I just want some medication to make it go away before its too late. Cause I realize at some point in time, I'll be unable to know that I'm ill.
if you're not in direct danger of hurting yourself or others then they shouldnt hospitalise you
try to be as honest as you can to the psych cus then theyl be in a better position to help as best as they can. if you're worried at all about it maybe you could just print off that list and give it to them
take care sweetie and let us know how it goes
xxxx
Should I tell my boyfriend about this? I've been with him for a year, and he's schizophrenic so I thought maybe he could help me out or at least listen.
but they keep telling me that he wont believe me or listen to me.
I had a problem like this earlier in the year, around summer, and he listened to me then, but I'm afraid that bringing it back up will cause him to leave me. I'm really afraid of this cause a former boyfriend left me for something much less serious; autism. So if my ex left me for autism, then its incredibly likely that my current bf will leave me for something far more serious, right?
It's down to you whether or not you tell him, but if you do tell him and he leaves you then he's not much of a friend really in my book. If he really cares he'll stick by you. If he has schizophrenia himself then hopefully he'll understand.
Isn’t it funny how day by day nothing changes but when you look back, everything is different…
you once called your brain a hard drive, well say hello to the virus.
It sounds like you have just gone through a list of diagnostic criteria but changed the order and that you have already decided what is wrong with you :) Am i right?
Best wishes
Bladey
I hate to say it hun but when I first read this post I thought the same but didn't want to be the first to note it - I know, I'm a chicken.
Have you ever looked up symptoms of an illness because it can make you start fitting your own problems around it? Perhaps you are knowledgeable re the symptoms because of your boyfriend's illness?
I'm sorry if you really are suffering from all those things. You should tell a dr who will refer you to a mental health team.
"Everything is possible through Christ, who gives me strength". Phillipians 4:13
It sounds like you have just gone through a list of diagnostic criteria but changed the order and that you have already decided what is wrong with you :) Am i right?
Best wishes
Bladey
Well... no? Not really... I just have a lot of people in my life that have mental illnesses and I know a lot of terms from being with them in the hospital occasionally and hearing the technical jargon from the doctors. Then again, I tend to use a lot of fancy words anyways. I keep my vocabulary on the big side. I probably should've downsized...
I don't know. Maybe I'm playing tricks on myself. I don't even believe me anymore. It'd be too much of a coincidence for something to be wrong with me.
It will probably just go away. I'll just try to ignore it or something...
I'm going to tell her tomorrow, but she'll just say I'm making it up.
Even the voices are saying I'm making this all up. That all I want is attention. If I wanted that, I would've told people about this 3 years ago, instead of sitting and letting it slowly get worse.
it sounds like you're rationalising, which is good - telling yourself that the voices can't be right because if you were attention-seeking then you wouldn't have kept this to yourself.
why do you think your psychiatrist will say you're making it up?
Well, cause they keep saying that no one will believe me. My best friend believed me, and last night they got really bad so I tried calling my byofriend, but got his mom instead, and was so desperate for help that I told her everything and um, I think she believed me too?
I'm not doing a very good job of not telling anyone. If I didn't want attention then I wouldn't tell anyone and I probably wouldn't be posting here.
...Have you ever looked up symptoms of an illness because it can make you start fitting your own problems around it?...
I did that once two years ago, but realized I had done it and stopped. I kinda avoid looking up illnesses but when I do, for research sake cause I love psychology, I always tell myself that its impossible for me to have anything that I'm reading about and try to ignore any similarities.
I just thought that maybe if I listed all the stuff I was experiencing then it would be easier for people to put ideas out there and to tell me if it was serious or not. I don't know...
there are so many reasons why these experiences can occur - from a schizophrenic illness to a response to stress and trauma. a LOT of people experience/have experienced symptoms of psychosis and it should be taken seriously, particularly when the experiences are distressing. nobody here can really say that they're not serious symptoms. your best bet would really be to speak to your psychiatrist about it.
wanting attention isn't the bad thing that people make it out to be. you're distressed, so it's totally understandable that you want help and answers. it's so much better to ask for help than to bottle it all up until it gets so bad you can't function anymore.
maybe even if you just test the water by telling your psych. things bit-by-bit, and see that she doesn't think you're making it up. xxx
Anyway, I hope you get the help you need, in whatever form that takes.Bladey
Ditto
I know I was scared about telling my psych re voices etc - I had been under the mh peeps about a year before I did. I don't have psychosis but something called pseudo-hallucinations due to bpd - because I know the voices can't actually be real and have insight into that, it isn't psychotic. I also see things and have paranoia, mood swings, etc. It seems to me that you have even more insight than I did at that time.
I'm not judging you but am a little fed up in general because recently it seems there are quite a few new members joining who are diagnosing themselves with psychosis but if they can think about this as a possible diagnosis they cannot be psychotic and it makes me feel as though my voices/hallucintations etc are being belittled.
You really should speak to a dr/psych as they will be able to diagnose if appropriate and offer any help that is required.
"Everything is possible through Christ, who gives me strength". Phillipians 4:13
