Triggering (Suicide/Sexual Abuse) - how do i tell her

[sammi]

i feel really really low atm, my meds are having no affect on me at all bu my doc wont give me any stronger cause i mite od on them :(
i dont feel safe anymore cause of wa e did, i cant talk to my mum or anyone ive jus got to pretend tha everythings ok an it never happend, an i cant carry on lyk this.
the main problem is my mum has bipolar an she's blackmailing me with my self harm, she's basically saying tha if i do anything she'll do the same and i cant deal with that.

ive been thinking about this a lot since it happend and i no im no longer safe from my self at home, and id be better off in hospital until i start to deal with what he did to me, and cause so much has happend in the past as well tha ive still not delt with. but i dont no how to tell my mum thats wat i want.
im jus terrified tha if i tell her tha then she's going to hurt herself because of me. i no the only way im going to get the help i need is by being in hospital bu how do i explain that to my mum...

[guiltyinnocence]

could you talk to your doctor about you feeling you would be better in hospital for a little bit? cus that way you could find out if you could be admitted and then worry about telling your mum
as for telling your mum, do u think it would be easier for your doctor or another professional to explain the situation? i know when i was admitted i didnt want to tell my parents so my psych rang them and explained the situation

[sammi]

i spoke to the on call psyc in a + e yesterday an she said if i really wanted to be admited i cud jus cum to a + e and they wud sort it out, its jus with my mum being mentally ill aswell and saying she'll harm herself if i do thats worrying me, bu the hospitals the only place i feel safe atm.
it mite be easyer for someone else to explain why to her bu cause she doesnt no about the sui attempts n stuff she probably wont understand.. she thinks im takin the mick by staying off work another week when im no were near ready to go back yet...

i no i need to do this, bu i cant deal with my mums reactions and moods if she and when she finds out, i jus cant deal with it anymore...

[guiltyinnocence]

*hugs*
hmmm...sounds a difficult situation...
firstly though, if u feel u need to go in then u need to go in
as for telling your mum. u could see if someone could come round and explain it to her while your there, or u could get someone to explain it to her after you've been admitted so the pressure of the mood swings etc arent on you. i mean the suicide attempts dont have to be mentioned to her, cud u not just get the doctor or whoever to just say you're very low and they want to keep an eye on ur meds or something and thats why you're being admitted?
sorry if im not being any use
take care of yourself
xxxx

[sammi]

its been helpful, thanks.

i think my best option is to go and see my gp again this week and explain to him about it and see what e says about it, its all i can do really.
i jus wish it could all jus go away and it never of happend.

it sounds like your mom is worried about you. can you kinda put the situation backwards, ask her if you said you'd self harm if she did, how would she feel type of thing? maybe she'll understand better.

[Katiee]

Hey,
If you think hospital will help you then I really think you should go for it. Maybe talk to your doctor about this, that's the only thing I can suggest. Take care. xo.