Triggering (Suicide) - the night 911 was called on me

[I Miss You]

two years ago..i was on a different site and i was in the chatroom...

of course i was feeling really bad that night.so i went offline and called one of my friends.

in the middle of the conversation(i dont remeber what brought it on), told my freind that i wanted to kill myself

and so she was online at the time,still in the chatroom.and we were talking..and she didnt tell me but she made a phone call to 911.

so at 4am in the morning.i was still on the computer at the time,and outside the bedroom window,a police officer showed up and said"sherrif's department open the door"

now im thinking"HOLY SHIT"...so i opened the door and went outside.and i saw two police officers and they were saying"we just got a call from so and so that you were going to kill yourself tonight"

so when the officers left they said"if u ever do this again...we will arrest you and put u in jail"

im thinking "oh great..i want to die..and u are threating me with jail"

that made me feel a whole lot better

the really sad part of this ordeal is that the freind who called 911 on me that morning eventually gave up on me and hates my guts now...according to her im a attention seeker,a liar..and god knows what else

it just goes to show u that whenever i get close to someone they always leave me


mabye i should have saved her the trouble and did it that morning


sad isnt it?

[Katiee]

Hun,
I'm really sorry to hear that. You're friend was probably worried about you that's why she called 911. She just wanted you to be safe. I'm sorry your friend now thinks you're an attention seeking, which obviously she doesn't understand if she thinks that. *HUGS* Are you getting any professional help and/or support? Take care. xo.

[Alone and Scared]

Hey, I actually feel completely and utterly the same. As soon as you let someone in and tell them everything, they leave you.

However, during an assessment for the psych ward yesterday, one of the nurses said that, it isn't that they leave you, it's just they are scared they are going to say the wrong thing - and they are also scared because they don't know how to help you...... So they don't say anything.

I know it's hard, and I don't know whether this is true, but I'm here either way. xx

[Lucius.]

That's awful, sweetheart, and the police had no right to say that to you. But, as people have already said, your former friend was probably worried about you, which shows that she cared. Sometimes people do things without thinking when they're worrying about someone.

I've not left you, angel, and nor will I ever.