When i was about 12, this alien girl came around to me, she's about a year older than me.
She was my lifeline... Someone in real life i could have conversations with and she was really smart. she could help me with schoolwork and then i USUALLY got the answers right.
I miss her. Really. I want someone there when i'm crying to hug me and help me.
She WAS real. she had a face. One day last year i drew her because i wanted something that normal people could see. She's almost like an elf. Pointy ears, short black hair... yellow eyes. it's so cute she blushes greenish.
I haven't seen toshi since july.
Where is she?... I want my friend back!
She'd go away for a few days or weeks before. But never that long, and never when i needed help.
this probably sounds psychotic or at least delusional....
I mean they might have noticed me talking to her.. but i've always 'talked to myself' so it's not like it was too weird.
I've tried to talk to her.. hoping she's just invisible but nearby enough that she can hear me.
She's got a mind connection to me... she knows i want her back around..
even if she's back on her homeworld... she can still read my mind. she still knows that i need help.
Did i do something wrong or bad to her?...
Woooooowwww.... if i didn't know this was me i'd wonder if the poster was off their meds... is it normal to have friends who if you said you saw them people would send you to a hospital?
Last edited by flying[star] : 15-03-2009 at 01:31 AM.
Reason: aftethough
i have.
She's not in my closet... or hiding behind me ready to supprise me with a hug (i wish) and when i call she doesnt answer anymore.
Even when i hadn't seen her.. she responded a few months ago...
short. just a hi i'm still alive.
Did she die?
Did too much time on earth kill her?
I WANT HER BACK. i don't care how crazy it sounds.
she was there. to hold my hand and help me. she wouldn't let me hurt myself unless i was able to overpower her her (which wasn't that often)
I'm going to be straight with you. It's completely normal when you're in a lot of distress to use fantasy as a way to cope and sometimes we get carried away and get to a point where we really genuinely believe that it's real. I've never told anyone this before, but when I was 12 or 13 I honestly believed something quite similar. It took me a couple of years to fully realise that it wasn't true, in fact it was impossible that it was true. I had been using that fantasy to escape from reality because I found life very very difficult and I had no other way of dealing with it, and I believe that's what's going on with you as well. It doesn't make you crazy, in fact it shows a lot of strength, because you've invented a very effective way of comforting yourself which genuinely makes you feel better. But at the same time it stops you connecting with your real feelings and distances you from real life.
She can still be there to hold your hand, she's not gone. You can have her there any time you want, you just have to close your eyes and imagine her next to you. She represents the compassionate part of yourself, the part of you that is strong, which sees the scared, sad child part of you and comforts her. Which means she's ALWAYS with you.
Take care.
s a r a h
* pm me * eating disorders info *
"Between two worlds life hovers like a star,
twixt night and morn, upon the horizon's verge."
- Lord Byron
I'm going to be straight with you. It's completely normal when you're in a lot of distress to use fantasy as a way to cope and sometimes we get carried away and get to a point where we really genuinely believe that it's real. I've never told anyone this before, but when I was 12 or 13 I honestly believed something quite similar. It took me a couple of years to fully realise that it wasn't true, in fact it was impossible that it was true. I had been using that fantasy to escape from reality because I found life very very difficult and I had no other way of dealing with it, and I believe that's what's going on with you as well. It doesn't make you crazy, in fact it shows a lot of strength, because you've invented a very effective way of comforting yourself which genuinely makes you feel better. But at the same time it stops you connecting with your real feelings and distances you from real life.
She can still be there to hold your hand, she's not gone. You can have her there any time you want, you just have to close your eyes and imagine her next to you. She represents the compassionate part of yourself, the part of you that is strong, which sees the scared, sad child part of you and comforts her. Which means she's ALWAYS with you.
Take care.
....but she hasn't been there!
something else.. i've just called her nurse.. she's stupid. can't connect and asks questions that don't make sense. i dont like nurse.
she said she hasdn't been around because her parents called her back, and she did try to talk to me i've just been blocking everyone and everything out
maybe she hasn't been around because you've been feeling so bad you didn't feel able to comfort yourself at all. Like you said, you've been blocking everything out to try and cope. Sometimes we don't feel able to let anyone try and comfort us, even ourselves. Just a thought.
I'm sorry you're struggling so much. I wish I could be with you and hold your hand since she's not there right now.
s a r a h
* pm me * eating disorders info *
"Between two worlds life hovers like a star,
twixt night and morn, upon the horizon's verge."
- Lord Byron
this may be the wrong thing to say, but
technically she may not exist, but it doesn't matter if no one else believes in her, so long as she's helping you.
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